Category Archives: People Jokes

Jokes on all kinds of people, police, fireman, official, bankers….

If men ruled the world

so-many-cctvs

Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number. Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to “I love you.” Hallmark would make “Sorry, what was your … Continue reading

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Guess the number of melons

are-you-looking-at-my-ass-sexy-girl

This blonde was walking down a road, when this guy came along. The blonde was carrying a bag. The guy goes, ”What are you carrying?” She goes, ”Melons.” The guy goes, ”Cool. if I can guess how many there are, … Continue reading

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Men and Women

funny-gorilla

I’M GLAD I’M A MAN I’m glad I’m a man, you better believe; I don’t live off of yogurt, diet coke, or cottage cheese. I don’t bitch to my girlfriends about the size of my breasts; I can get where … Continue reading

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Hold this stuff for a while

your-third-shoes-king-size-condom

Husband and wife are getting all snugly in bed. The passion is heating up. But then the wife stops and says: ”I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.” The husband says, ”WHAT??” The wife explains … Continue reading

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Rejected

terrosists-in-beach

These three married couples died and when they got to the pearly gates. St.Peter told the first husband, “I can’t let you in. You let alcohol run your life. You even married a girl named Sherry.” Dejected, he turned and … Continue reading

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Tennis balls

tennisball-field-staring-at-boobs

One day while jogging, a man noticed two tennis balls lying by the side of the road. He picked the balls up, put them in his pocket and proceeded on his way. Waiting at the cross street for the light … Continue reading

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Where are you going to find a lawyer in the heaven?

cheater-girl-with-boyfriends-friend

There was a construction worker who was working on a building when he fell 15 stories to his bloody death. He arrived at the pearly gates and St. Peter said ”Oh, I am sorry, my son. But you have been … Continue reading

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Blonde’s odometer

funny-stupid-hat

A blonde wanted to sell her car, but couldn’t find any buyers. She called her friend for advice, and her friend asked her how many miles she had on her car. “235,000 miles.” Her friend told her that was the … Continue reading

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Pig in the bar

funny-motorbike--first-world-lady-and-third-world-goat

A lady goes into a bar with her goose. Then the bartender comes up to her and says, ”Why did you have to bring the pig in with you?” Then the lady answered, ”Excuse me, I think this is a … Continue reading

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Do Not Disturb

funny-girls-hugging-fat-buttocks

An airline captain was helping a new blonde flight attendant prepare for her first overnight trip. Upon their arrival, the captain showed the flight attendant the best place for airline personnel to eat, shop, and stay overnight. The next morning … Continue reading

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Blondes in the mirror

nudity-is-not-allowed-on-motorbikes

Two blondes are walking down the street when one of them looks down and finds a mirror. She picks it up, looks at it. ”WOW! I know this person. I’ve seen this person before.” The other blonde takes the mirror … Continue reading

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It’s an hour fast!

funny-comoputer

A man is sitting at a bar one night, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The woman next to him says, “Wow, that’s a really fancy watch.” “Thanks, says the guy, “It’s the cutting … Continue reading

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Alligator shoes

office-moving-in-china

A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very … Continue reading

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After all, I was married to her for 40 years

photobomb-hairy-belly

Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge. One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across the bridge. He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head. The procession crosses the bridge and the … Continue reading

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Animals and fridge!

funny-Shopping-Bag-fitness-lady

1) How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator? You open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe and close the door. 2) How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator? You open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, … Continue reading

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Bill Gates in hell

sexy-techy-girl

Upon dying, Bill Gates went to purgatory. St. Peter said to his, “Now Bill, you have done some good things, and you have done some bad things. Now I am going to let you decide where you want to go”. … Continue reading

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Heal, not raise the dead

funny-gay-monkeys

An elderly couple are watching the 700 Club. The evangelist is getting really worked up, and it’s soon time for the healing portion of the show. “If you believe in the healing power of the Lord, place on hand on … Continue reading

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Blonde in first class cabin

funny-shoes-bottomless

A beautiful young blonde woman boards a plane to New York with a ticket for the coach section. She looks at the seats in coach and then looks into the forward cabin at the first class seats. Seeing that the … Continue reading

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A letter from Mom

funny-celebration-smoking-and-longevity

Dear Son, I’m writing this slow ’cause I know you can’t read fast. We don’t live where we did when you first left. Your Dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of home, so we … Continue reading

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A free wonderful weekend

funny-guy-with-sexy-game-girl

Sam and a beautiful woman walk into a very posh Beverly Hills furrier. “Show the lady your finest mink!” the fellow exclaims. So the owner of the shop goes in back and comes out with an absolutely gorgeous full-length coat. … Continue reading

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