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Category Archives: Blonde Jokes
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a … Continue reading
Two blondes realize that their apartment is on fire and go out onto the balcony. “Help, help!” yells one of the blondes. “Help us, help us!” yells the other. “Maybe it would help if we yelled together,” said the first … Continue reading
Man: Doc, you’ve gotta help me. I’m hearing voices but I don’t see people. Doc: And when are you hearing these voices? Man: When I’m on the telephone.
80,000 blondes are gathered for a Blondes Are Not Stupid convention. The leader says, “We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?” A blonde gingerly works her way … Continue reading
A blonde is walking down the street and a car pulled up next to her. The man in the car says to her, ”What do you have in the bag?” The blonde replies: ”I have chickens!” The man thinks for … Continue reading
One day a blonde was sitting on a plane next to one of those smart businessmen. He asks her if she would like to play a game. She politely declines, but the man explains the game to her anyway. He … Continue reading
A Brunette is walking through the country, when she finds a bottle. She rubs it and, you guessed it, a genie appears. The genie says,”You are allowed three wishes. But, I must warn you, anything you get, all the blondes … Continue reading
There was a blonde whose house was on fire. She calls the fire department screaming, ”Help me, help me. My house is on fire. Please!” The fire department operator says, ”Okay, okay. Calm down and we’ll be there soon. How … Continue reading
1. Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you? A: Tell her she’s pregnant. 2. Q: How does a blonde kill a fish? A: She drowns it. 3. Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? … Continue reading
Two blondes came into a bar, sat down, and ordered drinks. They were making merry in a serious way and it was obvious to the bartender that they were celebrating something big. His curiosity finally got the better of him … Continue reading
10) Are poisonous snakes really venomous? 9) Is lighter fluid flammable? 8) What hurts more: falling off a building, or a cliff? 7) Are knives sharp? 6) Can sharks hurt a human? 5) What happens if I stick my hand … Continue reading
The following sign was posted at a fast food restaurant owned by two blondes: “Parking for drive-through customers only!”
It was the first time the blonde was eating Thanksgiving dinner without her family. Trying to re-enact the tradition, she prepared a dinner for herself alone. The next day, her mother called to see how everything went. “Oh, mother, I … Continue reading
Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater? They went to see ”Closed for the Winter”.
A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened. “The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron.” “What about the other one?” “They called back.”
A blonde walked into a gas station and said to the manager, ”I locked my keys in my car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?” ”Why sure,” said … Continue reading