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Tag Archives: marriage
The guardian angel
A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice. ” Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.” The man stopped and a big brick … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged angel, marriage, street
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The fruits of love
A newlywed couple were spending their honeymoon in a remote log cabin resort way up the mountains. They had registered on Saturday and they had not been seen for 5 days. An elderly couple ran the resort, and they were … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged condom, honeymoon, man, marriage, resort, sex, woman
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Translating male phrases
“I’m going fishing.” Really means… “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “It’s a guy thing.” Really means…. “There is no … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes, Top 10 List
Tagged driving, family, man, marriage, phrases, woman
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You can try again
A young unmarried girl discovers that she is pregnant. Scared, she confides this ’news’ to her mother. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, “Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!”The girl picks up the … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes
Tagged boy, father, girl, marriage, miscarriage, mother, pregnant, teenage
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Devil in the church
One Sunday morning, everyone in one bright, beautiful, tiny town got up early and went to the local church. Before the services started, the townspeople were sitting in their pews and talking about their lives, their families, etc. Suddenly, Satan … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged church, marriage, Santa
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I can’t get into your panties!
A young couple, just married, were in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they were undressing for bed, the husband — who was a big burly man — tossed his trousers to his bride and said, “Here, put … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Holiday Jokes, Office Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes
Tagged honeymoon, husband, marriage, panties, wife
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A Tennessee divorce
Posted in Family Jokes, Tennessee Jokes
Tagged brother, divorce, marriage, redneck, sister, Tennessee
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Black and white in weddings
A little boy, at a wedding looks at his mom and says, “Mommy, why does the girl wear white?” His mom replies, “The bride is in white because she’s happy and this is the happiest day of her life.” The … Continue reading
Posted in Kids Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged bride, marriage
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What kind of boy did your daughter marry?
Congratulating a friend after her son and daughter got married within a month of each other, a woman asked, “What kind of boy did your daughter marry?” “Oh, he’s wonderful,” gushed the mother. “He lets her sleep late, ants her … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged daughter, marriage, mother, son
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Register wedding gifts
Jacob, age 92, and Rebecca, age 89, are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way they pass a drugstore. Jacob suggests they go in. Jacob addresses … Continue reading
Posted in Hospital Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged drug, gift, marriage
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the secret of success in marriage
A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, “Many years ago we made … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged child, husband, lesson, marriage, wife
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Marriage lessons
On their 40th wedding anniversary and during the banquet celebrating it, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration. “Tell us Tom, just what is it you have … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A
Tagged anniversary, husband, lesson, marriage, wedding
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Henry Ford on marriage
A reporter asked Henry Ford the secret of his successful married life. “Same as with cars – STICK TO ONE MODEL.”
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes, Short Q & A
Tagged car, Henery Ford, marriage, model, secret
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Good or bad?
A recently-married man goes into a drugstore to pick up some things. The clerk greets him…. Clerk: Hey, how did the wedding go? Man: Well, we got married. Clerk: That’s good! Man: No, that’s bad. I wasn’t wearing any clothes. … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Family Jokes, Office Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged clothes, fire, house, husband, marriage, rich, wife
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I am married to your sister
There is a man who goes out drinking all the time and comes home very later every night. So one night his wife decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan and decides to hide in the … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes
Tagged drink, husband, marriage, Satan, sister, wife
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She made me a better offer
During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer: “Look, I’ll give you $100 if you’ll change the wedding vows. When you get to the part where I’m to promise to ‘love, honor and obey’ and … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Holiday Jokes, Office Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged bride, groom, marriage, money, priest, vow
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Heavenly Reward
Three guys died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter met them there. St. Peter said, “I know that you guys are forgiven because you’re here. But before I let you into heaven, I have to ask … Continue reading
Posted in Car Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes
Tagged car, cheat, husband, Jaguar, marriage, Mercedes, Pinto, St. Peter, wife
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Mushrooms and marriage
A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time. “How wonderful! But I hope you don’t mind me asking what happened to your first husband?” “He ate poisonous mushrooms and died.” “Oh, how tragic! … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged husband, marriage, mushroom, poison, wife
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Get your oil changed
There was a 80 year-old man that married a 21 year-old woman. A year later the woman had a baby and the doctor came out and told the old man that he was the father of a 9lb 8oz baby … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Family Jokes, Hospital Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes
Tagged baby, doctor, hospital, husband, marriage, old, sex
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Buy me out
A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. “I love my daughter, and now I welcome you into the family,” said the man.”To show you how much we care for you, I’m making you a 50-50 partner … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes
Tagged daughter, factory, father, marriage, money, office
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