Category Archives: Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes

this is hot jokes on man and woman, all aspects

He said, she said

boys-like-balls

Girl and boy are having a relationship of about four months now. One Friday night they meet at a bar after work. They stay for a few, then go on to get some food at a local restaurant near their … Continue reading

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Get your oil changed

funny-old-gentleman-and-boobs

There was a 80 year-old man that married a 21 year-old woman. A year later the woman had a baby and the doctor came out and told the old man that he was the father of a 9lb 8oz baby … Continue reading

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Woman language

shit-slogan-my-boyfriends-wife-hate-these-boobs

WHAT WOMEN SAY & REALLY MEAN: CAN’T WE JUST BE FRIENDS? There is no way in hell I’m going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine,again. I JUST NEED SOME SPACE. … without you in … Continue reading

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I was hiding innocently in the fridge

cheater-caught

Three guys were at the Pearly Gates when Peter answered. He said there was one space open for someone. He asked them how they died. “I came home one day and saw my wife in bed, naked. I looked all … Continue reading

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Adam and Eve

nice-boobs

After spending time with Eve, Adam was walking in the Garden with God. Adam told God how much the woman means to him and how blessed he feels to have her. Adam began to ask questions about her. Adam: Lord, … Continue reading

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Chemistry men & women

crazy-guy-checking-girls-breast

Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50) Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily.  Fairly dense and sometimes flaky.Difficult to find a pure sample.  Due to rust, aging samples are unable … Continue reading

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Feel like a woman

girls-fishing-with-bra

I’m sitting on this plane, eating my dinner, when all of a sudden the captain comes on the loudspeaker and tells us that the plane is about to crash land into the mountains. The next thing I know this woman … Continue reading

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The reason why I fired my secretary

blow-job-wedding-cake

Two weeks ago was my forty-fifth birthday, and I wasn’t feeling too hot that morning anyway. I went to breakfast knowing my wife would be pleasant and say “Happy Birthday,” and probably have a present for me. She didn’t even … Continue reading

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Elephant and man

funny-wedding-cake-show-your-weapon

What did the elephant say to the naked man? ”It’s nice, but can it pick up peanuts?”

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TOP TEN THINGS THAT SOUND DIRTY IN GOLF BUT AREN’T

bikini-girl-on-beach

10. Nuts…my shaft is bent. 9. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 8. You really whacked the hell out of that sucker. 7. Look at the size of his putter. 6. Keep your head down and spread your legs … Continue reading

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Family history

look-like-girl-and-dog

One day a sweet little girl becomes puzzled about her origin. “How did I get here, Mommy?” she asks. Her mother replies, using a well-worn phrase, “Why God sent you, Honey.” “And did God send you too, Mommy?” she continues. … Continue reading

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I’m the Boss

I-rule-because-I-have-pussy

The boss was complaining in our staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect. The next day, he brought a small sign that read: “I’m the Boss!” He then taped it to his office door. Later that … Continue reading

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Buy me out

boy-and-sexy-model

A very successful businessman had a meeting with his new son-in-law. “I love my daughter, and now I welcome you into the family,” said the man.”To show you how much we care for you, I’m making you a 50-50 partner … Continue reading

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First sex with sheep

group-sex-doggy-style

Clem pulled over the car by the side of the road and showed Jed where h’d first had sex. “It was right down there by that tree. I remember the day plainly. It was a warm summer day. She and … Continue reading

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Colored hair

funny-wedding-harido

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall. A young man walked up to the bench and sat down. He had spiked hair in all different colors:green, red, orange, blue, and yellow. The old man just stared. … Continue reading

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A dog named Sex

a-dog-named-sex

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him “Rover” or “Spot”. I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog’s license, I told the … Continue reading

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You got an ’F’ in sex

funny-kids-strip-dance-and-babies

A little girl and her mother were out and about. Out of the blue, the girl asked her mother, “Mommy, How old are you?” The mother responded, “Honey, women don’t talk about their age. You’ll learn this as you get … Continue reading

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TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND…

hsexy-girl-hugs-for-25cents

10. Cats’ facial expressions 9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors 8. Why bean sprouts aren’t just weeds 7. Fat clothes 6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time 5. The … Continue reading

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The ex-wife and the genie

yard-sign-cheating-husband

One day a man was planting flowers outside his new house when he found a bottle with a cork in it. He took out the cork and with a poof, a genie came out. ”I will grant you three wishes … Continue reading

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Bra types

funny-Japanese-bra-sun-glasses

A man walked into the ladies department of a Macy’s, and walked up to the woman behind the counter and said, “I’d like to buy a bra for my wife” What type of bra?” asked the clerk. “Type?” inquires the … Continue reading

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