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Category Archives: Your Momma Jokes
Blonde ice fishing
A blonde wanted to go ice fishing, so after getting all of the right tools, she headed toward the nearest frozen lake. After getting comfy on her stool she started to cut a circular hole in the ice. Then from … Continue reading
Posted in Blonde Jokes, Sports Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged blonde, fishing, ice, rink
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Gassy granny
A little old lady goes to the doctor and says, “I have this problem with gas, but it really doesn’t bother me too much. They never smell and are always silent. As a matter of fact, I’ve farted at least … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Hospital Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged doctor, fart, hearing, hospital, sinuses
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What is it?
If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with. If it just sits in your room, messes up your stuff, … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Texas Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged birth, child, family, husband, marriage, wife
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Sharing
There was an elderly couple who went to McDonald’s. They ordered one cheeseburger, one large fry, one large drink, and an extra large soda. When the old couple sat down, the man sitting next to them watched the old man … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Restaurant Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged burger, food, husband, McDonald's, meal, teeth, wife
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Three hymns
One Sunday a pastor told the congregation that the church needed some extra money and asked the people to prayerfully consider giving a little extra in the offering plate. He said that whoever gave the most would be able to … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged church, donation, Hymn, man, pastor, sex, woman
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Grandma’s peanuts
A guy goes to visit his grandmother and he brings his friend with him. While he’s talking to his grandmother, his friend starts eating the peanuts on the coffee table, and finished them off. As they’re leaving, his friend says … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Office Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged denture, grandma, peanut, teeth
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Cat scan
There was a lady, who had a dog that she loved, and he followed her everywhere. One morning she woke up, went to the bathroom, came out, and realized that her dog wasn’t at her feet. She found him in … Continue reading
Posted in Animal Jokes, Family Jokes, Veterinarian Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged animal, bed, bill, cat, dog, sleep, Veterinarian, woman
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A letter from Mom
Dear Son, I’m writing this slow ’cause I know you can’t read fast. We don’t live where we did when you first left. Your Dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles of home, so we … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged coat, father, letter, money, mother, sister
1 Comment
Sunbath
A woman was staying at a hotel and she decided to go sunbathing on the hotel roof. When she laid down to sun her back, her bikini top fell off. She didn’t care so much, though, because nobody ever came … Continue reading
Posted in France and French Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes, People Jokes, Restaurant Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged bikini, hotel, restaurant, roof, skylight, sunbath, woman
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Mom’s favourite gift
Three sons left home to make their fortunes, and they all did very, very well for themselves. They got together recently and were discussing what they each had done to benefit their aging mother. “Well,” said the first one, “I … Continue reading
Posted in Animal Jokes, Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged Beverly Hills, child, gift, Mercedes, mother, parrot, son
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Good sons
Three women started boasting about their sons. “What a birthday I had last year!” exclaimed the first. “My son, that wonderful boy, threw me a big party in a fancy restaurant. He even paid for plane tickets for my friends.” … Continue reading
Posted in Birthday Jokes, Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, People Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged birthday, cruise, gift, Greece, mother, plane, psychiatrist, son
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Fishing?
A man phones home from the office and tells his wife, “Something has just come up. I have the chance to go fishing for a week. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away, so can you pack … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Sports Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged fishing, husband, pajamas, travel, wife
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Chocolate ice cream
A lady walked into a convenience store and asked the clerk for a pint of chocolate ice cream. The clerk told the lady “Miss, we are all out of chocolate ice cream.” The lady says “Oh, okay. Give me a … Continue reading
Posted in Hotel and Travel Jokes, Miscellaneous Jokes, People Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged chocolate, ice cream, spelling, woman
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Rosebuds
There was a young woman who lived with her grandmother. One night the granddaughter came bouncing down the stairs dressed to go out to a party wearing a see through blouse without a bra. Her grandmother told her to go … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged bra, girl, grandmother, party, rosebuds
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Future Irish mother-in-law
This young Dublin fella comes home all excited to tell his ma he’s fallen in love and going to get married. He says: “Just for fun, Ma, I’m going to bring over three women and you just try and guess … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged girl, girl friend, marriage, mother
1 Comment
The ritual
A woman is preparing Sunday dinner, as she has always done since she got married. Every Sunday they have boiled chicken and her daughter, now a teenager, is entrusted to assist. “Mum,” her daughter asks, “why do you use two … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Restaurant Jokes, Your Momma Jokes
Tagged chicken, mother, soup
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