Category Archives: Office Jokes

funny jokes on work, on office life

Too smart

bad-kid-drinking-smoking

A first grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, “Johnny what is your problem?” Johnny answered, “I’m too smart for the first grade. My sister is in the third grade and I’m smarter than … Continue reading

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Final exam

i-enjoy-masterbating

A high school English teacher reminds her class of tomorrow’s final exam. “Now class, I won’t tolerate any excuses for you not being there tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a … Continue reading

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A Spielberg joke

funny-pose-fucked-by-the-bishop

A Chinese walks into a bar in America one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap … Continue reading

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Tell me the color

real-porn-star

A woman is just about to give birth in the hospital when she says to the doctor, “Doc, do me a favor. Tell me what color the baby is as it’s being born.” The doctor is understandably a little puzzled … Continue reading

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Free trips

here-is-the-license, woman shows his breat to the traffic police

Three Apple engineers and three Microsoft employees are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three Microsoft employees each buy tickets and watch as the three Apple engineers buy only a single ticket. “How are three people … Continue reading

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Do you know who you’re talking to?

Sexy--black-coffee, man and woman

A Man joined a big multi-national company as a trainee. On his first day he dialed the pantry and shouted into the phone, “Get me a coffee quickly!” The voice from the other side responded,”You fool you’ve dialed the wrong … Continue reading

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How to please a woman?

happy-time-for-girls-and-funny-guy

A group of girlfriends is on vacation when they see a 5-story hotel with a sign that reads: “For Women Only”. Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The bouncer, a very attractive guy, … Continue reading

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Four sons

how-to-cut-a-queue

Four guys went golfing; one went in the clubhouse to pay while the others waited at the first tee. One of the guys says, “I’m so proud of my son. He is a stock broker and he’s made enough that … Continue reading

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The Manager’s Problem

obama enjoying the blow job

An office manager had money problems & had to fire an employee, either Jack or Jill… He thought he’d fire the employee who came late to work the next morning. Well, both employees came to work very early. Then the … Continue reading

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Tips for success in office

hair style to sleep in office

1. Never walk down the hall without a document in your hands. People with documents in their hands look like hardworking employees heading for important meetings. People with nothing in their hands look like they’re heading for the cafeteria. People … Continue reading

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A job interview

funny-blonde-parking

Gary wants a job as a signalman on the railways. He is told to meet the inspector at the signal box. The inspector puts this question to him: “What would you do if you realized that 2 trains were heading … Continue reading

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Painting

A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a new blonde girl painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why … Continue reading

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Hierarchy

From: General Manager To: Departmental Heads ”On Friday evening at 5 p.m., Halley’s Comet will be visible in this area—an event which occurs only once every 76 years. Please have the employees assemble in the park area outside the building … Continue reading

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Self fix

When my printer’s type began to grow faint, I called a local repair shop where a friendly man informed me that, probably, the printer only needed to be cleaned. Because the store charged $50 for such cleanings, he told me, … Continue reading

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He’s just a common tater!

One night, the Potato family sat down to dinner. Mother Potato and her three daughters. Midway through the meal,the eldest daughter spoke up. “Mother Potato?” she said. “I have an announcement to make.” “And what might that be?” said Mother, … Continue reading

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A fence bid

Three contractors were visiting a tourist attraction on the same day. One was from New York, another from Texas, and the third from Florida. At the end of the tour, the guard asked them what they did for a living. … Continue reading

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How’s married life?

John, an avant-garde painter, got married. Someone asked the bride a few weeks after the wedding, “How’s married life, Helen?” “It’s great,” she answered. “My husband paints, I cook; then we try to guess what he painted and what I … Continue reading

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The head hog

A man called the church office one day and said, “Can I please speak to the head hog at the trough?” The secretary, highly offended, said, “If you mean the pastor, then you may refer to him as ’Pastor’ or … Continue reading

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Goodbye, mother!

Walking through a supermarket, a young man noticed an old lady following him around. He ignored her for a while, but when he got to the checkout line, she got in front of him. “Pardon me,” she said. “I’m sorry … Continue reading

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Damaging food

A dietician was once addressing a large audience in Chicago. “The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago. Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of … Continue reading

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