Author Archives: JokesLab

Redneck lawn

You might be a redneck if you’re mowing your lawn and find a car.

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The ‘hind-lick’ maneuver

A woman goes into a restaurant in a small town in the South. She orders some chicken and starts to eat. Eating too fast, she starts to choke on a chicken bone. Buford and Buck, two country boys in the … Continue reading

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Redneck family reunion

You might be a redneck if you go to your family reunion to meet women!

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Redneck in-laws

You might be a redneck if you’ve been married three times and still have the same in-laws!

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Redneck sweetheart

You might be a redneck if you can’t get married to your sweetheart because there’s a law against it!

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Yeah, Alabama

A Tennessee man and an Alabama man were both fighting in a war and were captured by the enemy. “Before we put you to death,” said the enemy, “do you have any last requests?” “Yes,” said the Alabaman. “Could you … Continue reading

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Rednecks and underwear

How do you know when a redneck isn’t wearing any underwear? There’s dandruff on his/her shoes.

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Railroad redneck

Three railroad construction workers, a Chinese man, an Italian, and a redneck, are all sitting down to lunch. “Man,” the Chinese man says. “If I get another egg roll in my lunch, I’ll kill myself.” “Man,” the Italian says. “If … Continue reading

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A death in the blonde’s family

One day, a blonde’s neighbor goes over to her house, sees the blonde crying, and asks her what happened. The blonde said that her mother had passed away. The neighbor made her some coffee and calmed her down a little … Continue reading

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Blonde jokes

Q: How many blonde jokes are there? A: One. The rest are all true stories.

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Female hormones in beer

Two men were in a pub. One man said, ”Did you know that beer contains female hormones?” The other man said, ”No! Is it true?” ”Yes,” said the first man. ”If you drink too much, you start talking crap and … Continue reading

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Presidential surprise

The President was out walking on a beautiful snowy day, when he saw that somebody had urinated on the White House lawn to spell out “The President Sucks.” Infuriated, he called on the secret service to figure out who had … Continue reading

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TWO ANGELS SEEKING PETER

Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on top of their car that said: “TWO PROSTITUTES — $50.00.” A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they’d either have to remove the sign or go to … Continue reading

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Five good leads

Tommy Shaughnessy enters the confessional box and says, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose woman.” The priest asks, “Is that you, little Tommy Shaughnessy?” “Yes, Father, it is.” “And who was the woman … Continue reading

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Research findings

If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and 6 days, you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee. (Hardly seems worth it) If you fart consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas … Continue reading

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Texas thug athletes

If two Dallas Cowboys are in a car. Who’s driving? The cops.

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A basketball coach

In a class on abnormal psychology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression. The instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth, screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, … Continue reading

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Suffocated

Two guys were working at a sawmill one day when one of the guys got too close to the blade and cut off his arm. His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to … Continue reading

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Buried at Sea

This elderly Newfoundland fisherman is on his deathbed and summons his 3 sons to his bedside. “Well boys, the time is near, and when I pass I’d like to be buried at sea.” So the boys agreed. A few days … Continue reading

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A horoscope for the workplace

ASTROLOGY: tells us about you and your future simply by your birthday. The Chinese Zodiac uses the year of your birth. Demographics tell us what you like, dislike, whom you vote for, what you buy, and what you watch on … Continue reading

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