Category Archives: Campus Jokes

campus jokes, from K1 to university

Season pass

free-blow-job-if-you-buy-coke-here

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule … Continue reading

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Computer gender

sexy-tech-girl

      Women claim that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because: In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless. They are … Continue reading

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French horn

funny-Japanese-bra-cone

A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, “Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?” “Nah,” the first girl replied. “That dry, tight, tiny … Continue reading

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Mr. or Mrs. Computer?

Mr. or Mrs. Computer?

Is your computer male or female? As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., “Steady as she goes”, or”She’s listing to starboard, Captain!”). Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should … Continue reading

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Bad education

Bad education

Its Christmas at a normal family’s home…. 4 year old sister, mom, dad, 16 year old sister and 14 year old brother. Mom in the kitchen stuffing the turkey. All of a sudden turkey falls off counter and mom goes … Continue reading

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Top ten signs your spouse is having a cyber affair

stop-staring-tits, touch them

10. Lately, she sits at the computer naked. 9. After signing off, he always has a cigarette. 8. The giant rubber inflatable disk drive. 7. In the morning, the computer screen is all fogged up. 6. He’s gotten amazingly good … Continue reading

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Period

kids kissing in classroom

The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came for the little kids to give their reports, the teacher was calling on them … Continue reading

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The right choice

funny-family-photo-couple-and-a-masturbating-son

My 16-year-old brother, Ryan, was out late with friends one night. Suddenly he realized it was Father’s Day and he had neglected to buy a card for our dad. After much searching, Ryan located an open store, but was disappointed … Continue reading

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Glad Ass, Happy Butt

combing-hais-mother-and-daughters

It was this little girl’s first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, “Happy Butt.” The teacher said, “Honey I don’t think that’s your name you need to go to the principal’s … Continue reading

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The engineer at the golf course

Maradona-dick-size

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were waiting one morning for a particularly slow group of golfers. The engineer fumed, “What’s with these guys? We must have been waiting for 15 minutes!” “Ineptitude!” The pastor said, “Hey, here comes … Continue reading

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Not a flight instructor?

bikini-girl-on-beach

A photographer for a national magazine was assigned to take pictures of a great forest fire. He was advised that a small plane would be waiting to fly him over the fire. The photographer arrived at the airstrip just an … Continue reading

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Wise old man

shit-slogan-fbi-female-body-inspector

A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began. The very next afternoon three young … Continue reading

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Is hell exothermic or endothermic?

Dr. Schambaugh, of the University of Oklahoma School of Chemical Engineering, Final Exam for May of 1997 consisted of only one question.  His one and only final exam question in May 1997 for his Momentum, Heat and Mass Transfer II … Continue reading

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A software engineer, a hardware engineer and a branch manager

car-crash-photo

A Software Engineer, a Hardware Engineer and a Branch Manager were on their way to a meeting. They were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car failed. The car careened almost out of control … Continue reading

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You know you’re out of college when…

sexiest-teacher-guys-dream-for

1. Your salary is less than your tuition. 2. Your potted plants stay alive. 3. Shacking in a twin-sized bed seems absurd. 4. You keep more food than beer in the fridge. 5. You have to pay your own credit … Continue reading

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Plus sign

funny-kangaroo

A ten year-old Jewish boy was failing math. His parents tried everything from tutors to hypnosis; but to no avail. Finally, at the insistence of a family friend, they decided to enroll their son in a private Catholic school. After … Continue reading

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Revenge

you-take-the-woman-I-take-her-drink

There were two high school sweethearts who went out together for four years in high school and were both virgins and enjoyed losing their virginity with each other in 10th grade. When they graduated, they wanted to both go to … Continue reading

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Bush and his daughters

5-us-presidents-funny-obama-over-bush

Ever since the Bush daughters got into trouble with the law for underage drinking, the President has lectured them constantly about the evils of alcohol. His daughters were tired of having the same conversation week after week, so they finally … Continue reading

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Discrimination

boys-like-balls

It was recess and the pre-schoolers came in. The teacher asked Susie what she did today. ”Well, I played in the sandbox,” she said. The teacher said, ”If you can spell sand, I’ll give you a fresh-baked cookie.” So Susie … Continue reading

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Old MacDonald had a

roosters-playing-soccer

Two college basketball players were taking an important final exam. If they failed, they would be on academic probation and not allowed to play in the big game the following week. The exam was a fill-in-the-blank. The last question read, … Continue reading

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