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Category Archives: Computer Jokes
Computer gender
Women claim that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because: In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless. They are … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Computer Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List Tagged accessory, computer, data, female, gender, language, male, sex Leave a comment
Microsoft tech drafted
One of Microsoft Network’s finest support techs was drafted into the Army and sent to boot camp. At the rifle range, he was given some instructions, handed a rifle, and a couple rounds of ammo. He loaded the rifle and … Continue reading
Posted in Computer Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes Tagged army, finger, Microsoft, network, rifle, tech support Leave a comment
Computer dating
A hopeful suitor dropped into a computer-dating center and registered his qualifications. He wanted someone who enjoyed water sports, liked company, favored formal attire, and was very small. The computer operated faultlessly. It sent him a penguin.
Posted in Animal Jokes, Computer Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged animal, computer, date, penguin, sports, water Leave a comment
10 signs you are internet-addicted
10) You wake up at 3 am to go to the bathroom, and check your facebook on the way back to bed. 9) Your firstborn is named Dotcom. 8) You turn off your router and are suddenly filled with a … Continue reading
Posted in Computer Jokes, People Jokes, Top 10 List Tagged addiction, facebook, internet, sign Leave a comment
Deleted characters
Where do the characters go when I use my backspace or delete them on my PC? ANSWER: The characters go to different places, depending on whom you ask: The Buddhist explanation: If a character has lived rightly, and its karma … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Computer Jokes, Country Jokes, Office Jokes Tagged computer, IBM, PC Leave a comment
Blonde secretary’s memo to her boss
(you need know y2k problem on old computers…) TO: Boss FROM: Blondie RE: Changing Calendars from Y2K I hope that I haven’t misunderstood your instructions because, to be honest, none of this Y to K problem made much sense to … Continue reading
Posted in Blonde Jokes, Computer Jokes, Office Jokes Tagged blonde, calendar, computer, office Leave a comment
No Ears
A man was in a bad accident and was injured. But the only permanent damage he suffered was the loss of both ears, which made him very self-conscious. However, he received a large sum of money from his insurance company. … Continue reading
Posted in Computer Jokes, Hospital Jokes, Office Jokes Tagged contact, ear, interview Leave a comment
A software engineer, a hardware engineer and a branch manager
A Software Engineer, a Hardware Engineer and a Branch Manager were on their way to a meeting. They were driving down a steep mountain road when suddenly the brakes on their car failed. The car careened almost out of control … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Car Jokes, Computer Jokes, Office Jokes Tagged accident, brake, car, engineer, hardware, manager, mountain, software Leave a comment
The latest version of the Internet
Customer: “So that’ll get me connected to the Internet, right?” Tech Support: “Yeah.” Customer: “And that’s the latest version of the Internet, right?” Tech Support: “Uhh…uh…uh…yeah.”
Posted in Computer Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Short Q & A, Texas Jokes, Your Momma Jokes Tagged internet, tech support Leave a comment
Microsoft car
At a computer expo, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 … Continue reading
Posted in Car Jokes, Computer Jokes, People Jokes Tagged Bill Gates, car, General Motors, Microsoft Leave a comment
Bill Gates’ punishment
Satan greets him: “Welcome Mr. Gates, we’ve been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You’ve been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you’ve got me in a good mood, I’ll … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Computer Jokes, People Jokes Tagged Bill Gates, computer, St. Peter Leave a comment
To my loving wife
A couple from Minneapolis decided to go to Florida for a long weekend to thaw out during one particularly icy winter. Because both had jobs, they had difficulty coordinating their travel schedules. It was decided that the husband would fly … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Computer Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes Tagged email, Florida, funeral, window Leave a comment
Email from a friend
Email from a friend: “CanYouFixTheSpaceBarOnMyKeyboard?”
Microsoft building
A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft’s electronic navigation and communications equipment. Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter’s position. The pilot saw a tall … Continue reading
If XXX made toasters
If Oracle made toasters… They’d claim their toaster was compatible with all brands and styles of bread, but when you got it home you’d discover the Bagel Engine was still in development, the Croissant Extension was three years away and … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Computer Jokes, Family Jokes, Science Jokes Tagged computer, HP, IBM, Microsoft, Oracle, software, toaster Leave a comment
Bill Gates and General Motors
Bill Gates is hanging out with the chairman of General Motors. “If automotive technology had kept pace with computer technology over the past few decades,” boasts Gates, “you would now be driving a V-32 instead of a V-8, and it … Continue reading
A man with no ears
A man was in a bad accident and was injured. But the only permanent damage he suffered was the loss of both ears, which made him very self-conscious. However, he received a large sum of money from his insurance company. … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Computer Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes Tagged accident, computer, contact lense, ear, interview Leave a comment
Journey to the other side
Mr. Johnson, a businessman from Wisconsin, went on a business trip to Louisiana. He immediately sent an e-mail back home to his wife, Jennifer, to let her know he had arrived safely. Unfortunately, he mistyped a letter and the e-mail … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Computer Jokes, Family Jokes, Holiday Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Science Jokes Tagged businessman, email, hotel, husband, preacher, trip, wife Leave a comment
Writing’s powerful message
There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed a desire to become a “great” writer. When asked to define “great” he said “I want to write stuff that the whole world will read,stuff that people will react … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Computer Jokes, Office Jokes Tagged error, message, Microsoft, Windows, writer Leave a comment
Computer vs. air conditioner
How is a computer like an air conditioner? When you open Windows it won’t work!
Posted in Computer Jokes, Short Q & A Tagged air conditioning, computer, crash, Microsoft, Windows Leave a comment