Category Archives: Hospital Jokes

jokes on health, hospital, medical, well being, doctors, nurses, patients

Tell me the color

real-porn-star

A woman is just about to give birth in the hospital when she says to the doctor, “Doc, do me a favor. Tell me what color the baby is as it’s being born.” The doctor is understandably a little puzzled … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

The pain

funny-girl-not-everything-is-flat-in-florida

A young brunette goes into the doctor’s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it. “Impossible,” says the doctor. “Show me.” She takes her finger and pushes her elbow and screams in agony. She pushes her knee … Continue reading

Posted in Blonde Jokes, Hospital Jokes | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

The honeymoon cruise

A man and his wife were going on a cruise for their honeymoon. They packed their bags and got ready to go but forgot two things – condoms and dramamine, since the man gets terrible motion sickness on ships. So … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Diet for stress

Breakfast: 1/2 grapefruit 1 slice whole wheat toast 8 oz. skim milk Lunch: 4 oz. lean broiled chicken breast 1 cup steamed spinach 1 cup herb tea 1 Oreo cookie Mid-Afternoon Snack: The rest of Oreos in the package 2 … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes, Restaurant Jokes | Tagged | Leave a comment

Mental institution exam

Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them two questions. If they answered correctly, they were deemed cured and free to go. Jon was called … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes, People Jokes | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Suffocated

Two guys were working at a sawmill one day when one of the guys got too close to the blade and cut off his arm. His buddy put the severed arm in a plastic bag and rushed it down to … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes, People Jokes | Tagged | Leave a comment

Blonde in pain

There was a blonde who was hurting all over so she went to the doctor. The doctor said, ”Where are you hurting?” She said, ”Everywhere. See?” She touched her arm and said, “OUCH!” She touched her leg and, “OUCH!” She … Continue reading

Posted in Blonde Jokes, Hospital Jokes | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Blonde nurse

Q: Why does a blonde nurse carry around a red pen? A: To draw blood.

Posted in Blonde Jokes, Hospital Jokes, Short Q & A | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

Santa Singh

There was this case in the hospital’s Intensive Care ward where patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning at 11 a.m., regardless of their medical condition. This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

It makes your eyes bulge and your ears protrude

This middle-aged guy wakes up one morning and notices that his eyes are bulging and his ears are protruding. He becomes very concerned. So he goes to his doctor and asks him what is wrong with him. The doctor told … Continue reading

Posted in Hospital Jokes, People Jokes | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Do you think it’s the light that’s attracting them?

In the back woods of Arkansas, Mr. Stewart’s wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a … Continue reading

Posted in Family Jokes, Hospital Jokes | Tagged , | Leave a comment