Category Archives: Holiday Jokes

all jokes on holidays

what the new year looks like

funny-how-to-lift-baby

A family of three where sitting next to the TV watching the countdown for the new year. The two brothers (one 7 the other 5) cheered when the countdown had finished. The youngest one raced to the nearest window to … Continue reading

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New Year’s present

funny-slogan-i-wish-these-were-brains, sexy blonde

Jemima was taking an afternoon nap on New Year’s Eve before the festivities. After she woke up, she confided to Max, her husband, ’I just dreamed that you gave me a diamond ring for a New Year’s present. What do … Continue reading

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To feel like a woman

funny blow job

On a Trans-Atlantic flight, a plane passes through a severe storm. The turbulence is awful, and things go from bad to worse when one wing is struck by lightning. One woman in particular loses it. Screaming, she stands up in … Continue reading

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A sign of the times

finally signoff  icq in the grave

As a little girl climbed onto Santa’s lap, Santa asked the usual, “And what would you like for Christmas?” The child stared at him open mouthed and horrified for a minute, then gasped: “Didn’t you get my E-mail?”  

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Thanksgiving fart

Bob and Martha have been married for 15 years. Every morning for 15 years, Bob wakes up, farts loudly, rolls over onto his back and gets up for work. Every morning for 15 years, Martha says, “One of these days, … Continue reading

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