{"id":972,"date":"2012-07-17T10:44:56","date_gmt":"2012-07-17T10:44:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/"},"modified":"2012-07-07T13:55:24","modified_gmt":"2012-07-07T13:55:24","slug":"only-in-america","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/","title":{"rendered":"Only in America"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>1. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-6999\" title=\"american-flag-model-bikini\" src=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg\" alt=\"american-flag-model-bikini\" width=\"400\" height=\"533\" srcset=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg 400w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-150x200.jpg 150w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini.jpg 450w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/>2. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.<\/p>\n<p>3. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.<\/p>\n<p>4. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do people order double cheese burgers, large fries, and a diet Coke.<\/p>\n<p>5. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do banks leave both doors to the vault open and then chain the pens to the counters.<\/p>\n<p>6. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage.<\/p>\n<p>7. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won&#8217;t miss a call from someone we didn&#8217;t want to talk to in the first place.<\/p>\n<p>8. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight.<\/p>\n<p>9. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do we use the word &#8216;politics&#8217; to describe the process so well: Poli&#8217; in Latin meaning &#8216;many&#8217; and &#8216;tics&#8217; meaning &#8216;bloodsucking creatures&#8217;.<\/p>\n<p>10. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" src=\"\" class=\"alignleft wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>1. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. 2. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. 3. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do drugstores make the sick walk all the way &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[304,14,20],"tags":[1237,785,400,62,521,68,670,669,144],"class_list":["post-972","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-american-jokes","category-politician-jokes","category-top-10-list","tag-ambulence","tag-america","tag-burger","tag-car","tag-cigarette","tag-drug","tag-parking","tag-pizza","tag-top-10-list-2"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.8 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Only in America -American Jokes, Politician Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Only in America -American Jokes, Politician Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"1. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. 2. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. 3. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do drugstores make the sick walk all the way &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-07-17T10:44:56+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"headline\":\"Only in America\",\"datePublished\":\"2012-07-17T10:44:56+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":210,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2011\\\/07\\\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"ambulence\",\"America\",\"burger\",\"car\",\"cigarette\",\"drug\",\"parking\",\"pizza\",\"top 10 list\"],\"articleSection\":[\"American Jokes\",\"Politician Jokes\",\"Top 10 List\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/\",\"name\":\"Only in America -American Jokes, Politician Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#website\"},\"primaryImageOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2011\\\/07\\\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg\",\"datePublished\":\"2012-07-17T10:44:56+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#primaryimage\",\"url\":\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2011\\\/07\\\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg\",\"contentUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2011\\\/07\\\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg\"},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/972\\\/politician-jokes\\\/only-in-america\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Only in America\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/\",\"name\":\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\",\"description\":\"the best collection of clean jokes\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\",\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"caption\":\"JokesLab\"},\"sameAs\":[\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/author\\\/adminblog\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Only in America -American Jokes, Politician Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Only in America -American Jokes, Politician Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","og_description":"1. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance. 2. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink. 3. Only in America&#8230;&#8230;do drugstores make the sick walk all the way &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;","og_url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/","og_site_name":"JokesLab Funniest Jokes","article_published_time":"2012-07-17T10:44:56+00:00","og_image":[{"url":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg","type":"","width":"","height":""}],"author":"JokesLab","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"JokesLab","Est. reading time":"1 minute"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/"},"author":{"name":"JokesLab","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34"},"headline":"Only in America","datePublished":"2012-07-17T10:44:56+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/"},"wordCount":210,"commentCount":0,"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg","keywords":["ambulence","America","burger","car","cigarette","drug","parking","pizza","top 10 list"],"articleSection":["American Jokes","Politician Jokes","Top 10 List"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/","url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/","name":"Only in America -American Jokes, Politician Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg","datePublished":"2012-07-17T10:44:56+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/"]}]},{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#primaryimage","url":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg","contentUrl":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/american-flag-model-bikini-400x533.jpg"},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/972\/politician-jokes\/only-in-america\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Only in America"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#website","url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/","name":"JokesLab Funniest Jokes","description":"the best collection of clean jokes","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34","name":"JokesLab","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","caption":"JokesLab"},"sameAs":["http:\/\/jokeslab.com"],"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/author\/adminblog\/"}]}},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1258,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1258\/politician-jokes\/top-10-reasons-for-being-an-american\/","url_meta":{"origin":972,"position":0},"title":"Top 10 reasons for being an American","author":"JokesLab","date":"July 11, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"1. You can have a woman president without electing her 2. You can spell colour wrong and get away with it. 3. You can call Budweiser beer 4. You can be a crook and still be a president 5. If you've got enough money you can get elected to do\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Alaska Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Alaska Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/country-jokes\/alaska-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny-pose-obama-enjoying-blow-job","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-pose-obama-enjoying-blow-job-400x291.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":2034,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/2034\/people-jokes\/great-uncle-george\/","url_meta":{"origin":972,"position":1},"title":"Great-uncle George","author":"JokesLab","date":"October 22, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"The Smith\u2019s were proud of their family tradition. Their ancestors had come to America on the Mayflower. They had included Senators and Wall Street wizards. They decided to compile a family history, a legacy for their children and grandchildren. They hired a fine author. Only one problem arose \u2014 how\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Family Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"Dmitry-Medvedev-got-faked-jacket","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/Dmitry-Medvedev-got-faked-jacket-400x265.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1907,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1907\/people-jokes\/a-spielberg-joke\/","url_meta":{"origin":972,"position":2},"title":"A Spielberg joke","author":"JokesLab","date":"September 21, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"A Chinese walks into a bar in America one night and he saw Steven Spielberg. As he was a great fan of his movies, he rushes over to him, and asks for his autograph. Instead, Spielberg gives him a slap and says, \"You Chinese people bombed our Pearl Harbor, get\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;American Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"American Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/country-jokes\/american-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny-pose-fucked-by-the-bishop","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/funny-pose-fucked-by-the-bishop.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1734,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1734\/politician-jokes\/kiss-bush\/","url_meta":{"origin":972,"position":3},"title":"Kiss Bush","author":"JokesLab","date":"April 3, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"A wounded American soldier in a battlefield hospital in Iraq tells the nurse: \"I wish I could kiss the American flag if I am going to die!\" Nurse, extremely touched by the soldier's patriotism: \"Actually, I have the American flag tattooed on my bottom. You may kiss my ass, if\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;American Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"American Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/country-jokes\/american-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny-pose-I-enjoy-the-blow-job with Mr.McDonald","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-pose-I-enjoy-the-blow-job.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1047,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1047\/church-jokes\/the-pope-is-his-driver\/","url_meta":{"origin":972,"position":4},"title":"the Pope is his driver","author":"JokesLab","date":"January 6, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"One day, the Pope is visiting America and driving around Washington in his limo when he gets an idea. \"Driver? Can I drive for a while?\" \"Sure,\" says the driver. How can you say no to the Pope? So the Pope takes the wheel and starts driving like a maniac\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;American Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"American Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/country-jokes\/american-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny condom ad, endrosed by the Pope","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-pop-condom.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1155,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1155\/campus-jokes\/how-to-be-obnoxious-in-classroom\/","url_meta":{"origin":972,"position":5},"title":"How to be obnoxious in classroom?","author":"JokesLab","date":"June 29, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"1) In the middle of class, run to the middle of the room screaming, ''I'm on fire!'' Roll around vigorously. 2) Get up to sharpen your pencil as much as possible. 3) Ask your teacher how good their spouse was last night. 4) Talk in a strong English accent. 5)\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Campus Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Campus Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/campus-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/972","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=972"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/972\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=972"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=972"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=972"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}