{"id":953,"date":"2011-07-06T09:29:53","date_gmt":"2011-07-06T09:29:53","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2011-07-06T09:29:53","modified_gmt":"2011-07-06T09:29:53","slug":"mental-institution-exam","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/","title":{"rendered":"Mental institution exam"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them two questions. If they answered correctly, they were deemed cured and free to go.<\/p>\n<p>Jon was called into the doctor&#8217;s office first and asked if he understood that he&#8217;d be free if he answered the questions correctly.  The doctor said, &#8220;Jon, what would happen if I poked out one of your eyes?&#8221;  Jon said, &#8220;I&#8217;d be half blind.&#8221;  &#8220;That&#8217;s correct. What would happen if I poked out both your eyes?&#8221;  &#8220;I&#8217;d be completely blind.&#8221;  The doctor stood up, shook his hand, and told him he was free.<\/p>\n<p>On Jon&#8217;s way out, as the doctor filled out the paperwork, Jon mentioned the questions to Dan. He told him what questions would be asked and the  answers.  Dan was called in. The doctor went through the formalities and asked, &#8220;What would happen if I cut off one of your ears?&#8221;  Dan, remembering what Jon had said, said, &#8220;I&#8217;d be half blind.&#8221;   The doctor looked a little puzzled, but went on. &#8220;What would happen if I cut off both your ears?&#8221;    &#8220;I&#8217;d be completely blind.&#8221;   &#8220;Dan, how can you explain that you&#8217;d be blind?&#8221; asked the doctor.   &#8220;Well,&#8221; replied Dan, &#8220;my hat would fall over my eyes.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" src=\"\" class=\"alignleft wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them two questions. If they answered correctly, they were deemed cured and free to go. Jon was called &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[13,3],"tags":[457,164,182,94],"class_list":["post-953","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-hospital-jokes","category-people-jokes","tag-ear","tag-exam","tag-eye","tag-mental-hospital"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Mental institution exam -Hospital Jokes, People Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Mental institution exam -Hospital Jokes, People Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them two questions. If they answered correctly, they were deemed cured and free to go. Jon was called &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-07-06T09:29:53+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"headline\":\"Mental institution exam\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-06T09:29:53+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":229,\"commentCount\":0,\"keywords\":[\"ear\",\"exam\",\"eye\",\"mental hospital\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Hospital Jokes\",\"People Jokes\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/\",\"name\":\"Mental institution exam -Hospital Jokes, People Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-06T09:29:53+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/953\\\/people-jokes\\\/mental-institution-exam\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Mental institution exam\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/\",\"name\":\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\",\"description\":\"the best collection of clean jokes\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\",\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"caption\":\"JokesLab\"},\"sameAs\":[\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/author\\\/adminblog\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Mental institution exam -Hospital Jokes, People Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Mental institution exam -Hospital Jokes, People Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","og_description":"Jon and Dan were in a mental institution. This place had an annual contest, picking two of the best patients and giving them two questions. If they answered correctly, they were deemed cured and free to go. Jon was called &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;","og_url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/","og_site_name":"JokesLab Funniest Jokes","article_published_time":"2011-07-06T09:29:53+00:00","author":"JokesLab","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"JokesLab","Est. reading time":"1 minute"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/"},"author":{"name":"JokesLab","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34"},"headline":"Mental institution exam","datePublished":"2011-07-06T09:29:53+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/"},"wordCount":229,"commentCount":0,"keywords":["ear","exam","eye","mental hospital"],"articleSection":["Hospital Jokes","People Jokes"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/","url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/","name":"Mental institution exam -Hospital Jokes, People Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-07-06T09:29:53+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/953\/people-jokes\/mental-institution-exam\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Mental institution exam"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#website","url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/","name":"JokesLab Funniest Jokes","description":"the best collection of clean jokes","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34","name":"JokesLab","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","caption":"JokesLab"},"sameAs":["http:\/\/jokeslab.com"],"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/author\/adminblog\/"}]}},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1945,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1945\/people-jokes\/why-did-you-eat-him\/","url_meta":{"origin":953,"position":0},"title":"Why did you eat him?","author":"JokesLab","date":"April 11, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"A three-year-old walked up to a pregnant lady while waiting with his mother in the doctor\u2019s office. He inquisitively asked the lady, \"Why is your stomach so big?\" She replied, \"I\u2019m having a baby.\" With big eyes, he asked, \"Is the baby in your stomach?\" She answered, \"He sure is.\"\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Campus Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Campus Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/campus-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny-kid-i-pad-myself","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-kid-i-pad-myself1.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":948,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/948\/hospital-jokes\/medical-term-and-plain-english\/","url_meta":{"origin":953,"position":1},"title":"Medical term and plain English","author":"JokesLab","date":"August 13, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said, \"Now, Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what is wrong with me.\" \"Well, in plain English,\" the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Family Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny-shirt-huge-pen-or-huge-penis","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-shirt-huge-pen-or-huge-penis1-400x471.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":723,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/723\/hospital-jokes\/do-you-think-its-the-light-thats-attracting-them\/","url_meta":{"origin":953,"position":2},"title":"Do you think it&#8217;s the light that&#8217;s attracting them?","author":"JokesLab","date":"June 28, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"In the back woods of Arkansas, Mr. Stewart's wife went into labor in the middle of the night, and the doctor was called out to assist in the delivery. To keep the nervous father-to-be busy, the doctor handed him a lantern and said, \"Here, you hold this high so I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Family Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":628,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/628\/hospital-jokes\/brain-transplant\/","url_meta":{"origin":953,"position":3},"title":"Brain transplant","author":"JokesLab","date":"June 18, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"A patient needed a brain transplant and the doctor told the family, ''Brains are very expensive, and you will have to pay the costs yourselves.'' ''Well, how much does a brain cost?'' asked the relatives. ''For a male brain, $500,000. For a female brain, $200,000,'' replied the doctor. Some of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Family Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2068,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/2068\/hospital-jokes\/a-great-surprise\/","url_meta":{"origin":953,"position":4},"title":"A great surprise","author":"JokesLab","date":"September 30, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"A ret ired man went to a doctor for a general check-up. The doctor told the retiree that everything was fine and that, in fact, he was\"in real good shape for a man of 93.\" \"That\u2019s good to know because I\u2019m getting married in two weeks,\" said the retiree. \"Getting\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Family Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"shit-slogan-fbi-female-body-inspector","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/shit-slogan-fbi-female-body-inspector.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":600,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/600\/hospital-jokes\/doctors-orders\/","url_meta":{"origin":953,"position":5},"title":"Doctor&#8217;s orders","author":"JokesLab","date":"August 9, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"A woman accompanied her husband to the doctor's office. After his checkup, the doctor called the wife into his office alone. He said, \"Your husband is suffering from a very severe stress disorder. If you don't do the following, your husband will surely die.\" \"Each morning, fix him a healthy\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Family Jokes&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"funny-woman-on-beach","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-woman-on-beach-400x488.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/953","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=953"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/953\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=953"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=953"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=953"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}