{"id":919,"date":"2012-03-15T10:49:07","date_gmt":"2012-03-15T10:49:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/919\/hospital-jokes\/hilarious-signs\/"},"modified":"2012-03-09T14:18:12","modified_gmt":"2012-03-09T14:18:12","slug":"hilarious-signs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/919\/hospital-jokes\/hilarious-signs\/","title":{"rendered":"Hilarious signs"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"funny-shit-slogan-i-dont-need-sex\"Over a gynecologist’s office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”<\/p>\n

On a plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.”<\/p>\n

On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”<\/p>\n

Pizza shop slogan: “7 days without pizza makes one weak.”<\/p>\n

Outside a muffler shop: “No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”<\/p>\n

In a veterinarian’s waiting room: “Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”<\/p>\n

Door of a plastic surgeon’s office: “We can help you pick your nose!”<\/p>\n

On an electrician’s truck: “Let us remove your shorts.”<\/p>\n

In a non-smoking area: “If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.”<\/p>\n

On a maternity room door: “Push. Push. Push.”<\/p>\n

At an optometrist’s office: “If you don’t see what you’re looking for, you’ve come to the right place.”<\/p>\n

In the front yard of a funeral home: “Drive carefully. We’ll wait.<\/strong>“<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"<\/a>

Over a gynecologist’s office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.” On a plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.” On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: “Don’t sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.” Pizza shop … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[13,24,18,32,20],"tags":[453,92,684,1128,1130,1129,669,1126,1125,592,1127,346],"class_list":["post-919","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-hospital-jokes","category-miscellaneous-jokes","category-office-jokes","category-short-q-a","category-top-10-list","tag-electrician","tag-funeral","tag-gynecologist","tag-maternity","tag-muffler","tag-optometrist","tag-pizza","tag-plastic-surgeon","tag-plumber","tag-sign","tag-smoking","tag-veterinarian"],"yoast_head":"\nHilarious signs -Hospital Jokes, Miscellaneous Jokes, Office Jokes, Short Q & A, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/919\/hospital-jokes\/hilarious-signs\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Hilarious signs -Hospital Jokes, Miscellaneous Jokes, Office Jokes, Short Q & A, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Over a gynecologist’s office: “Dr. Jones, at your cervix.” On a plumber’s truck: “We repair what your husband fixed.” On the trucks of a local plumbing company in NE Pennsylvania: “Don’t sleep with a drip. 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