{"id":66,"date":"2012-02-02T11:37:32","date_gmt":"2012-02-02T11:37:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/66\/people-jokes\/hymn-365\/"},"modified":"2012-01-28T01:46:54","modified_gmt":"2012-01-28T01:46:54","slug":"hymn-365","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/66\/people-jokes\/hymn-365\/","title":{"rendered":"Hymn #365"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great expression, he said, &#8220;If I had all the beer in the world, I&#8217;d take it and pour it into the river.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-full wp-image-6534\" title=\"funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka\" src=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka.jpg\" alt=\"funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka\" width=\"550\" height=\"782\" srcset=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka.jpg 550w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka-150x213.jpg 150w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka-400x568.jpg 400w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 550px) 100vw, 550px\" \/>With even greater emphasis, he said, &#8220;And if I had all the wine in the world, I&#8217;d take it and pour it into the river.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>And finally, he cried, &#8220;And if I had all the whiskey in the world, I&#8217;d take it and pour it into the river.&#8221; Sermon complete, he then sat down.<\/p>\n<p>After a few moments, the song leader stood very cautiously and announced with a smile, &#8220;For our closing song, let us sing Hymn #365: &#8216;Shall We Gather at the River&#8217;.&#8221;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/66\/people-jokes\/hymn-365\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" src=\"\" class=\"alignleft wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great expression, he said, &#8220;If I had all the beer in the world, I&#8217;d take it and pour it into the river.&#8221; With even greater emphasis, he said, &#8220;And if I &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/66\/people-jokes\/hymn-365\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[201,3,14],"tags":[134,185,225,202,36,676,203],"class_list":["post-66","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-church-jokes","category-people-jokes","category-politician-jokes","tag-beer","tag-church","tag-drink","tag-hymn","tag-river","tag-sermon","tag-wine"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Hymn #365 -Church and God Jokes, People Jokes, Politician Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/66\/people-jokes\/hymn-365\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Hymn #365 -Church and God Jokes, People Jokes, Politician Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"A southern minister was completing a temperance sermon. With great expression, he said, &#8220;If I had all the beer in the world, I&#8217;d take it and pour it into the river.&#8221; With even greater emphasis, he said, &#8220;And if I &hellip; Continue reading &rarr;\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/66\/people-jokes\/hymn-365\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2012-02-02T11:37:32+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka.jpg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"headline\":\"Hymn #365\",\"datePublished\":\"2012-02-02T11:37:32+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":118,\"commentCount\":0,\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2011\\\/06\\\/funny-and-sexy-ads-flirt-vodka.jpg\",\"keywords\":[\"beer\",\"church\",\"drink\",\"Hymn\",\"river\",\"sermon\",\"wine\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Church and God Jokes\",\"People Jokes\",\"Politician Jokes\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/66\\\/people-jokes\\\/hymn-365\\\/\",\"name\":\"Hymn #365 -Church and God Jokes, People Jokes, Politician Jokes - 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