{"id":563,"date":"2012-11-08T13:00:45","date_gmt":"2012-11-08T13:00:45","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/563\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/heavenly-reward\/"},"modified":"2012-11-04T07:25:18","modified_gmt":"2012-11-04T07:25:18","slug":"heavenly-reward","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/563\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/heavenly-reward\/","title":{"rendered":"Heavenly Reward"},"content":{"rendered":"

Three guys died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter met them there.<\/p>\n

\"bikini-girl-on-beach\"St. Peter said, “I know that you guys are forgiven because you’re here. But before I let you into heaven, I have to ask you a couple of questions. Make sure you tell the truth because if you don’t, we’ll have to ask you to visit the beast below. Your answers will also determine what kind of car you will get. You have to have a car here in heaven because it is so huge!”<\/p>\n

St. Peter asked the first man, “How long were you married?”<\/p>\n

The guy replied, “24 years.”<\/p>\n

St. Peter then asked, “Did you ever cheat on your wife?”<\/p>\n

The guy said, “Yeah, about 10 times… but you said I was forgiven.”<\/p>\n

Peter said, “Yes, but that’s not too good. Here’s a Pinto for you to drive.”<\/p>\n

The second guy got the same questions from Peter to which he replied, “I was married for 41 years and cheated on her only once, but that was during our first year and we worked it out. I was faithful thereafter.”<\/p>\n

Peter said, “I’m pleased to hear that. Here’s a Mercedes SUV for you to drive.”<\/p>\n

The third guy said, “Peter, I know what you’re going to ask. I was married for 63 years and didn’t even look at another woman! I treated my wife like a queen!”<\/p>\n

Peter said, “Now that’s what I like to hear! Here’s a Jaguar for you to drive.”<\/p>\n

A little while later, the two guys with the Mercedes and the Pinto saw the guy with the Jaguar crying on the golden sidewalk, so they went to see what was the matter. When they asked him what was wrong he tearily said, “I just saw my wife and she was on a skateboard!”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"<\/a>

Three guys died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter met them there. St. Peter said, “I know that you guys are forgiven because you’re here. But before I let you into heaven, I have to ask … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[213,201,222,21,247],"tags":[62,107,53,702,76,215,703,207,54],"class_list":["post-563","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-car-jokes","category-church-jokes","category-family-jokes","category-relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes","category-texas-jokes","tag-car","tag-cheat","tag-husband","tag-jaguar","tag-marriage","tag-mercedes","tag-pinto","tag-st-peter","tag-wife"],"yoast_head":"\nHeavenly Reward -Car Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/563\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/heavenly-reward\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Heavenly Reward -Car Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Three guys died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter met them there. 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He said there was one space open for someone. He asked them how they died. \"I came home one day and saw my wife in bed, naked. I looked all over the house and decided to check the balcony. I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Church and God Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Church and God Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/church-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"cheater-caught","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/cheater-caught-400x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":575,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/575\/people-jokes\/rejected\/","url_meta":{"origin":563,"position":1},"title":"Rejected","author":"JokesLab","date":"May 22, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"These three married couples died and when they got to the pearly gates. St.Peter told the first husband, \u201cI can't let you in. You let alcohol run your life. 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