{"id":556,"date":"2012-10-16T09:34:43","date_gmt":"2012-10-16T09:34:43","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/556\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/chemistry-men-women\/"},"modified":"2012-10-06T02:21:54","modified_gmt":"2012-10-06T02:21:54","slug":"chemistry-men-women","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/556\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/chemistry-men-women\/","title":{"rendered":"Chemistry men & women"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"crazy-guy-checking-girls-breast\"Element Name: MAN
\nSymbol: XY
\nAtomic Weight: (180 +\/- 50)<\/p>\n

Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily.\u00a0 Fairly dense and sometimes flaky.Difficult to find a pure sample.\u00a0 Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.<\/p>\n

Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get.\u00a0 Also tends to form strong bonds with itself.\u00a0 Become sex plosive when mixed with Kd (Element: Child) for prolonged period of time. Neutralize by dousing with alcohol.<\/p>\n

Usage: None known.\u00a0 Possibly good methane source. Good samples are able to produce\u00a0 large quantities on command.<\/p>\n

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to smell.<\/p>\n

\n

Element Name: WOMAN
\nSymbol: WO
\nAtomic Weight: (don’t even go there!)<\/p>\n

Physical properties: Generally round in form.\u00a0 Boils at nothing and may freeze any time.\u00a0 Melts whenever treated properly.\u00a0 Very bitter if not used well.<\/p>\n

Chemical properties: Very active.\u00a0 Often unstable. Possesses strong affinity for gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones.\u00a0 Violent when left alone.\u00a0 Able to absorb great amounts of exotic food.\u00a0 Turns slightly green when placed next to a better specimen.<\/p>\n

Usage: Highly ornamental.\u00a0 An extremely good catalyst for dispersion of wealth.\u00a0 Probably the most powerful income reducing agent known.<\/p>\n

Caution: Highly explosive in inexperienced hands.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"<\/a>

Element Name: MAN Symbol: XY Atomic Weight: (180 +\/- 50) Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily.\u00a0 Fairly dense and sometimes flaky.Difficult to find a pure sample.\u00a0 Due to rust, aging samples are unable … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[21,191],"tags":[693,34,1277,763,33],"class_list":["post-556","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes","category-science-jokes","tag-chemistry","tag-man","tag-physical","tag-properties","tag-woman"],"yoast_head":"\nChemistry men & women -Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Science Jokes - 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Occurrence: Copious quantities throughout the world. Physical properties: Surface usually covered with a painted field and a variety of esthers. Boils at nothing, freezes without reason. Melts when given special treatment. Bitter\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1776,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1776\/relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes\/the-perfect-man\/","url_meta":{"origin":556,"position":1},"title":"The perfect man","author":"JokesLab","date":"December 29, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"At a local coffee bar, a young woman was expounding on her idea of the perfect mate to some of her friends. \"The man I marry must be a shining light amongst company. He must be musical. Tell jokes. Sing. 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