{"id":536,"date":"2012-10-24T12:54:03","date_gmt":"2012-10-24T12:54:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/536\/top-10-list\/woman-language\/"},"modified":"2012-10-06T03:18:07","modified_gmt":"2012-10-06T03:18:07","slug":"woman-language","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/536\/top-10-list\/woman-language\/","title":{"rendered":"Woman language"},"content":{"rendered":"

WHAT WOMEN SAY & REALLY MEAN:<\/span><\/p>\n

\"shit-slogan-my-boyfriends-wife-hate-these-boobs\"CAN’T WE JUST BE FRIENDS?
\nThere is no way in hell I’m going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine,again.<\/p>\n

I JUST NEED SOME SPACE.
\n… without you in it.<\/p>\n

DO I LOOK FAT IN THIS DRESS?
\nWe haven’t had a fight in a while.<\/p>\n

NO, PIZZA’S FINE.
\n… you cheap slob!<\/p>\n

I JUST DON’T WANT A BOYFRIEND NOW.
\nI just don’t want you as a boyfriend now.<\/p>\n

I DON’T KNOW, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO?
\nI can’t believe you have nothing planned.<\/p>\n

COME HERE.
\nMy puppy does this, too.<\/p>\n

I LIKE YOU, BUT…
\nI don’t like you.<\/p>\n

OF COURSE I LOVE YOU.
\n… just not in that way.<\/p>\n

YOU NEVER LISTEN.
\nYou never listen.<\/p>\n

WE’RE MOVING TOO QUICKLY.
\nI’m not going to sleep with you until I find out if this guy at the gym has a girlfriend.<\/p>\n

I’LL BE READY IN A MINUTE.
\nI’m ready, but I’m going to make you wait because I know you will.<\/p>\n

OH, NO, I’LL PAY FOR MYSELF.
\nI’m just being nice; there’s no way I’m going dutch.<\/p>\n

OH YES!!! RIGHT THERE!!
\nWell, near there; I just want to get this over with.<\/p>\n

I’M JUST GOING OUT WITH THE GIRLS.
\nWe’re gonna get sloppy and make fun of you and your friends.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"<\/a>

WHAT WOMEN SAY & REALLY MEAN: CAN’T WE JUST BE FRIENDS? There is no way in hell I’m going to let any part of your body touch any part of mine,again. I JUST NEED SOME SPACE. … without you in … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[21,20],"tags":[1280,891,1005,1027,701,154,33],"class_list":["post-536","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes","category-top-10-list","tag-dress","tag-food","tag-friend","tag-language","tag-phases","tag-sex","tag-woman"],"yoast_head":"\nWoman language -Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/536\/top-10-list\/woman-language\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Woman language -Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"WHAT WOMEN SAY & REALLY MEAN: CAN’T WE JUST BE FRIENDS? 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