{"id":1871,"date":"2013-12-22T13:48:17","date_gmt":"2013-12-22T13:48:17","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1871\/kids-jokes\/holding-for-ransom\/"},"modified":"2013-12-21T08:17:37","modified_gmt":"2013-12-21T08:17:37","slug":"holding-for-ransom","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1871\/kids-jokes\/holding-for-ransom\/","title":{"rendered":"Holding for ransom"},"content":{"rendered":"

Little Johnny was planning on getting lots of presents for Christmas. He knew that god had a connection to the North Pole, and stood up and started to pray.<\/p>\n

\"funny<\/a>

Did I say no?<\/p><\/div>\n

\u201cGod, i have been a child of perfection this year. I think i should get lots of presents\u2026 no that won\u2019t work.\u201d<\/p>\n

He got on his knees. \u201cGod, I haven\u2019t been the best child since last December. I still deserve lots of presents for my efforts\u2026 no that can\u2019t work either!\u201d<\/p>\n

He laid face flat on the floor. \u201cGod, I have been a complete devil this year. But i can change, I promise! No, there\u2019s no way he believe that!\u201d<\/p>\n

Johnny went to his last resort. He walked over to the modle of the stable that Jesus was born in. Little Johnny reached in and pulled out the virgin Mary. He went into his room, wrapped Mary in a sock, and placed her in his drawer.<\/p>\n

\u201cGod, if you ever want to see your mother again\u2026”<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"<\/a>

Little Johnny was planning on getting lots of presents for Christmas. He knew that god had a connection to the North Pole, and stood up and started to pray. \u201cGod, i have been a child of perfection this year. 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