{"id":1723,"date":"2014-04-09T04:13:09","date_gmt":"2014-04-09T04:13:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1723\/top-10-list\/top-ten-things-not-to-say-to-your-new-girlfriends-parents\/"},"modified":"2014-03-17T12:23:37","modified_gmt":"2014-03-17T12:23:37","slug":"top-ten-things-not-to-say-to-your-new-girlfriends-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1723\/top-10-list\/top-ten-things-not-to-say-to-your-new-girlfriends-parents\/","title":{"rendered":"Top ten things NOT to say to your new girlfriend&#8217;s parents&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-swallowing-sperm.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignleft size-medium wp-image-6586\" alt=\"Top ten things NOT to say to your new girlfriend's parents\" src=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-swallowing-sperm-400x550.jpg\" width=\"400\" height=\"550\" srcset=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-swallowing-sperm-400x550.jpg 400w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-swallowing-sperm-150x206.jpg 150w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/06\/funny-and-sexy-ads-swallowing-sperm.jpg 550w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a>10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I&#8217;m not sure how long that cop car will stay lost.<\/p>\n<p>9. There ain&#8217;t nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! I bet Sara&#8217;s will be okay too.<\/p>\n<p>8. Nice place you got here. That painting looks expensive. I bet a nice home like this came with a safe already built in, didn&#8217;t it?<\/p>\n<p>7. Sara is so pretty I&#8217;ve decided to give up being bisexual just for her.<\/p>\n<p>6. Those home pregnancy kits aren&#8217;t very reliable in my opinion.<\/p>\n<div id=\"attachment_6009\" style=\"width: 565px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-beach-love-making.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-6009\" class=\"size-full wp-image-6009\" title=\"funny-beach-love-making, faked penis\" alt=\"funny-beach-love-making, faked penis\" src=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-beach-love-making.jpg\" width=\"555\" height=\"353\" srcset=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-beach-love-making.jpg 555w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-beach-love-making-300x190.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 555px) 100vw, 555px\" \/><\/a><p id=\"caption-attachment-6009\" class=\"wp-caption-text\">You both faked it.<\/p><\/div>\n<p>5. We&#8217;re going to keep our relationship quiet for now. My wife can be rather vindictive at times.<\/p>\n<p>4. Can you believe it! Those shit heads at the corner market won&#8217;t cash my welfare check!<\/p>\n<p>3. Which one of you taught Sara to give such great head?<\/p>\n<p>2. Did you see that saucer that flew over town yesterday?<\/p>\n<p>1. My parole officer thinks Sara has a calming effect on me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1723\/top-10-list\/top-ten-things-not-to-say-to-your-new-girlfriends-parents\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" src=\"\" class=\"alignleft wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I&#8217;m not sure how long that cop car will stay lost. 9. There ain&#8217;t nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! I bet Sara&#8217;s &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1723\/top-10-list\/top-ten-things-not-to-say-to-your-new-girlfriends-parents\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[21,20],"tags":[62,423,171,154,144],"class_list":["post-1723","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-relationship-marriage-and-sex-jokes","category-top-10-list","tag-car","tag-girl-friend","tag-mother-in-law","tag-sex","tag-top-10-list-2"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Top ten things NOT to say to your new girlfriend&#039;s parents... -Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1723\/top-10-list\/top-ten-things-not-to-say-to-your-new-girlfriends-parents\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Top ten things NOT to say to your new girlfriend&#039;s parents... -Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I&#8217;m not sure how long that cop car will stay lost. 9. There ain&#8217;t nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! 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