{"id":1339,"date":"2012-06-02T10:03:56","date_gmt":"2012-06-02T10:03:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1339\/office-jokes\/true-newspaper-clippings\/"},"modified":"2012-05-27T02:17:18","modified_gmt":"2012-05-27T02:17:18","slug":"true-newspaper-clippings","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1339\/office-jokes\/true-newspaper-clippings\/","title":{"rendered":"True newspaper clippings"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1339\/office-jokes\/true-newspaper-clippings\/attachment\/funny-sign-ride-the-slut\/\" rel=\"attachment wp-att-6859\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-6859\" title=\"funny-sign-ride-the-slut\" src=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-sign-ride-the-slut-400x472.jpg\" alt=\"funny-sign-ride-the-slut\" width=\"400\" height=\"472\" srcset=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-sign-ride-the-slut-400x472.jpg 400w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-sign-ride-the-slut-150x177.jpg 150w, https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/funny-sign-ride-the-slut.jpg 550w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 400px) 100vw, 400px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB &#8212; $850\/offer<\/li>\n<li>AMANA WASHER $100. OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED.<\/li>\n<li>SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE&#8230; ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS.<\/li>\n<li>FREE PUPPIES&#8230;PART GERMAN SHEPHERD &#8211; PART DOG<\/li>\n<li>2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: 1 5-finger, 1 3-finger, PAIR: $15<\/li>\n<li>TICKLE ME ELMO, STILL IN BOX, COMES WITH IT&#8217;S OWN 1988 MUSTANG, 5L, AUTO, EXCELLENT CONDITION $6800<\/li>\n<li>COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED&#8230; ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE.<\/li>\n<li>83 TOYOTA HUNCHBACK &#8212; $2000<\/li>\n<li>STAR WARS JOB OF THE HUT &#8212; $15<\/li>\n<li>FREE PUPPIES: COCKER SPANIEL &#8211; SNEAKY NEIGHBOR&#8217;S DOG<\/li>\n<li>FREE YORKSHIRE TERRIER. 8 YEARS OLD. UNPLEASANT LITTLE DOG.<\/li>\n<li>SOFT &amp; GENITAL BATH TISSUES OR FACIAL TISSUE 89 cents<\/li>\n<li>GERMAN SHEPHERD 85 lbs. NEUTERED. SPEAKS GERMAN. FREE.<\/li>\n<li>FULL SIZED MATTRESS. 20 YR. WARRANTY. LIKE NEW. SLIGHT URINE SMELL.<\/li>\n<li>FREE 1 CAN OF PORK &amp; BEANS WITH PURCHASE OF 3 BR 2 BATH HOME.<\/li>\n<li>FOR SALE: LEE MAJORS (6 MILLION DOLLAR MAN) &#8211; $50<\/li>\n<li>NORDIC TRACK $300 HARDLY USED CALL CHUBBIE<\/li>\n<li>BILL&#8217;S SEPTIC CLEANING &#8220;WE HAUL AMERICAN MADE PRODUCTS&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>SHAKESPEARE&#8217;S PIZZA &#8211; FREE CHOPSTICKS<\/li>\n<li>FOUND: DIRTY WHITE DOG. LOOKS LIKE A RAT&#8230; BEEN OUT AWHILE.. BETTER BE REWARD.<\/li>\n<li>HUMMELS &#8211; LARGEST SELECTION EVER &#8220;IF IT&#8217;S IN STOCK, WE HAVE IT!&#8221;<\/li>\n<li>GET A LITTLE JOHN: THE TRAVELING URINAL HOLDS 2 BOTTLES OF BEER.<\/li>\n<li>HARRISBURG POSTAL EMPLOYEES GUN CLUB<\/li>\n<li>GEORGIA PEACHES &#8211; CALIFORNIA GROWN &#8211; 89 cents lb.<\/li>\n<li>NICE PARACHUTE: NEVER OPENED &#8211; USED ONCE SLIGHTLY STAINED<\/li>\n<li>FREE: FARM KITTENS. READY TO EAT.<\/li>\n<li>AMERICAN FLAG 60 STARS &#8211; POLE INCLUDED $100<\/li>\n<li>TIRED OF WORKING FOR ONLY $9.75 PER HOUR? WE OFFER PROFIT SHARING AND FLEXIBLE HOURS. STARTING PAY: $7 &#8211; $9 PER HOUR.<\/li>\n<li>NOTICE: TO THE PERSON OR PERSONS WHO TOOK THE LARGE PUMPKIN ON HIGHWAY 87 NEAR SOUTHRIDGE STORAGE: PLEASE RETURN THE PUMPKIN AND BE CHECKED. PUMPKIN MAY BE RADIOACTIVE. ALL OTHER PLANTS IN VICINITY ARE DEAD.<\/li>\n<li>EXERCISE EQUIPMENT: QUEEN SIZE MATTRESS &amp; BOX SPRINGS &#8211; $175.<\/li>\n<li>OUR SOFA SEATS THE WHOLE MOB AND IT&#8217;S MADE OF 100% ITALIAN LEATHER.<\/li>\n<li>JOINING NUDIST COLONY! MUST SELL WASHER &amp; DRYER $300.<\/li>\n<li>LAWYER SAYS CLIENT IS NOT THAT GUILTY.<\/li>\n<li>ALZHEIMER&#8217;S CENTER PREPARES FOR AN AFFAIR TO REMEMBER<\/li>\n<li>GROUND BEAST: 99 cents lb.<\/li>\n<li>GAS CLOUD CLEARS OUT TACO BELL.<\/li>\n<li>BAR S SLICED BOLOGNA REGULAR OR TASTY SAVE 30 CENTS ON 2<\/li>\n<li>OPEN HOUSE BODY SHAPERS TONING SALON FREE COFFEE &amp; DONUTS<\/li>\n<li>KELLOGG&#8217;S POT TARTS &#8211; $1.99 box<\/li>\n<li>FULLY COOKED BONELESS SMOKED MAN &#8211; $2.09 lb.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1339\/office-jokes\/true-newspaper-clippings\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" src=\"\" class=\"alignleft wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB &#8212; $850\/offer AMANA WASHER $100. OWNED BY CLEAN BACHELOR WHO SELDOM WASHED. SNOW BLOWER FOR SALE&#8230; ONLY USED ON SNOWY DAYS. FREE PUPPIES&#8230;PART GERMAN SHEPHERD &#8211; PART DOG 2 WIRE MESH BUTCHERING GLOVES: 1 &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1339\/office-jokes\/true-newspaper-clippings\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[24,18,20],"tags":[826],"class_list":["post-1339","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-miscellaneous-jokes","category-office-jokes","category-top-10-list","tag-advertisement"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.0 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>True newspaper clippings -Miscellaneous Jokes, Office Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1339\/office-jokes\/true-newspaper-clippings\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"True newspaper clippings -Miscellaneous Jokes, Office Jokes, Top 10 List - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB &#8212; $850\/offer AMANA WASHER $100. 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