{"id":1321,"date":"2011-07-06T12:08:46","date_gmt":"2011-07-06T12:08:46","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2011-07-06T12:08:46","modified_gmt":"2011-07-06T12:08:46","slug":"never-believe-in-washingtons-story","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/","title":{"rendered":"Never believe in Washington’s story"},"content":{"rendered":"

‘One time, back in the ”day,” a boy named Johnny was walking to school with his girlfriend. He was trying to impress her, so he said, ”I bet you I can push my father’s outhouse into the river.” She didn’t agree with him, so he proved her wrong. Impressed, she walked the rest of the way to school hand in hand with Johnny.<\/p>\n

That day at school, they studied the story about George Washington and the cherry tree. The moral that they learned was ”never tell a lie”.<\/p>\n

After school, Johnny went home. When he walked in the door, his dad met him. He said, ”Son, did you push my outhouse into the river?” Johnny said, ”Dad, I want to be like George Washington and never lie, yes, I did.”<\/p>\n

His dad beat him from one end of the house to the other. You could have read the newspaper off of Johnny’s rear end. After Johnny was finished sobbing, he asked his father,”Dad, why did you whoop me? I didn’t lie. George Washington cut down the cherry tree and didn’t lie about it, and he didn’t get a whooping.”<\/p>\n

Johnny’s dad looked at him and said, ”Son, I bet George Washington’s dad wasn’t sitting in that cherry tree when he cut it down, was he?”’<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"\"\"<\/a>

‘One time, back in the ”day,” a boy named Johnny was walking to school with his girlfriend. He was trying to impress her, so he said, ”I bet you I can push my father’s outhouse into the river.” She didn’t … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[42],"tags":[813,461],"class_list":["post-1321","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-kids-jokes","tag-george-washingron","tag-lie"],"yoast_head":"\nNever believe in Washington's story -Kids Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Never believe in Washington's story -Kids Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"‘One time, back in the ”day,” a boy named Johnny was walking to school with his girlfriend. He was trying to impress her, so he said, ”I bet you I can push my father’s outhouse into the river.” She didn’t … Continue reading →\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2011-07-06T12:08:46+00:00\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"JokesLab\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"1 minute\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"headline\":\"Never believe in Washington’s story\",\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-06T12:08:46+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":231,\"commentCount\":0,\"keywords\":[\"George Washingron\",\"lie\"],\"articleSection\":[\"Kids Jokes\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/\",\"name\":\"Never believe in Washington's story -Kids Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"2011-07-06T12:08:46+00:00\",\"author\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\"},\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/1321\\\/kids-jokes\\\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\\\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"Never believe in Washington’s story\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/\",\"name\":\"JokesLab Funniest Jokes\",\"description\":\"the best collection of clean jokes\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":{\"@type\":\"PropertyValueSpecification\",\"valueRequired\":true,\"valueName\":\"search_term_string\"}}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34\",\"name\":\"JokesLab\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/secure.gravatar.com\\\/avatar\\\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g\",\"caption\":\"JokesLab\"},\"sameAs\":[\"http:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\"],\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/jokeslab.com\\\/jokes\\\/author\\\/adminblog\\\/\"}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"Never believe in Washington's story -Kids Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Never believe in Washington's story -Kids Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","og_description":"‘One time, back in the ”day,” a boy named Johnny was walking to school with his girlfriend. He was trying to impress her, so he said, ”I bet you I can push my father’s outhouse into the river.” She didn’t … Continue reading →","og_url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/","og_site_name":"JokesLab Funniest Jokes","article_published_time":"2011-07-06T12:08:46+00:00","author":"JokesLab","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"JokesLab","Est. reading time":"1 minute"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/"},"author":{"name":"JokesLab","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34"},"headline":"Never believe in Washington’s story","datePublished":"2011-07-06T12:08:46+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/"},"wordCount":231,"commentCount":0,"keywords":["George Washingron","lie"],"articleSection":["Kids Jokes"],"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"CommentAction","name":"Comment","target":["https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/#respond"]}]},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/","url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/","name":"Never believe in Washington's story -Kids Jokes - JokesLab Funniest Jokes","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#website"},"datePublished":"2011-07-06T12:08:46+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34"},"breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1321\/kids-jokes\/never-believe-in-washingtons-story\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"Never believe in Washington’s story"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#website","url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/","name":"JokesLab Funniest Jokes","description":"the best collection of clean jokes","potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":{"@type":"PropertyValueSpecification","valueRequired":true,"valueName":"search_term_string"}}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/#\/schema\/person\/7c94a8e90f50ee6381e1cdf0be369f34","name":"JokesLab","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/1ddeb11c3ee03f5ac75289908398f7c36b4cb3b51cf8fc4561a798c09b6c5574?s=96&d=monsterid&r=g","caption":"JokesLab"},"sameAs":["http:\/\/jokeslab.com"],"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/author\/adminblog\/"}]}},"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":1023,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1023\/politician-jokes\/bush-fans\/","url_meta":{"origin":1321,"position":0},"title":"Bush fans","author":"JokesLab","date":"June 30, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"There's a teacher in a small Texas town. She asks her class how many of them are Bush fans. Not really knowing what a Bush fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raise their hands except one boy, Johnny. The teacher asks Johnny why\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Campus Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Campus Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/campus-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"sexy-Dallas-cheerleaders-girls","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/sexy-Dallas-cheerleaders-girls-400x266.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1753,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1753\/campus-jokes\/period\/","url_meta":{"origin":1321,"position":1},"title":"Period","author":"JokesLab","date":"March 26, 2014","format":false,"excerpt":"The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came for the little kids to give their reports, the teacher was calling on them one at a time. Eventually little Johnny\u2019s turn came. Little\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Campus Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Campus Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/campus-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"kids kissing in classroom","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/funny-kids-kissing.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1913,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1913\/office-jokes\/too-smart\/","url_meta":{"origin":1321,"position":2},"title":"Too smart","author":"JokesLab","date":"September 23, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"A first grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, \"Johnny what is your problem?\" Johnny answered, \"I\u2019m too smart for the first grade. My sister is in the third grade and I\u2019m smarter than she is! I think I should be in the third\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Campus Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Campus Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/campus-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"bad-kid-drinking-smoking","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/bad-kid-drinking-smoking.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1422,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1422\/office-jokes\/little-johnny\/","url_meta":{"origin":1321,"position":3},"title":"Little Johnny","author":"JokesLab","date":"January 24, 2013","format":false,"excerpt":"There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn't know what Johnny's problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load, or two pickles short of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Family Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Family Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/family-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"a-curious-baby-checking-mother-buttocks","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/07\/a-curious-baby-checking-mother-buttocks1.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1742,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1742\/campus-jokes\/chemical-formula-for-water\/","url_meta":{"origin":1321,"position":4},"title":"Chemical formula for water","author":"JokesLab","date":"August 29, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Little Johnny's teacher asks, \"What is the chemical formula for water?\" Little Johnny replies, \"HIJKLMNO\"!! The teacher, puzzled, asks, \"What on Earth are you talking about?\" Little Johnny replies, \"Yesterday you said it was H to O!\"","rel":"","context":"In "Campus Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Campus Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/campus-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"boy-and-sexy-model","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/boy-and-sexy-model.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/boy-and-sexy-model.jpg?resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/boy-and-sexy-model.jpg?resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1741,"url":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1741\/animal-jokes\/little-johnnys-essay\/","url_meta":{"origin":1321,"position":5},"title":"Little Johnny’s essay","author":"JokesLab","date":"September 2, 2012","format":false,"excerpt":"Little Johnny's teacher said, \"Johnny, your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sister's.\" Did you copy hers?, she asked. Johnny replied, \"No, teacher, it's the same dog!\"","rel":"","context":"In "Animal Jokes"","block_context":{"text":"Animal Jokes","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/cat\/animal-jokes\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"why-dog-is-better-than-boy-friend","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/08\/why-dog-is-better-than-boy-friend.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1321","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1321"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1321\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1321"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1321"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1321"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}