{"id":1293,"date":"2011-07-07T05:36:26","date_gmt":"2011-07-07T05:36:26","guid":{"rendered":""},"modified":"2011-07-07T05:36:26","modified_gmt":"2011-07-07T05:36:26","slug":"top-10-ways-to-get-rid-of-telemarketers","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1293\/office-jokes\/top-10-ways-to-get-rid-of-telemarketers\/","title":{"rendered":"Top 10 ways to get rid of telemarketers"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>10) Pretend you don&#8217;t speak English.    <\/p>\n<p>9) Say \u201cHold on,\u201d then scream to a person:  \u201cIf you try to take the knife out, it&#8217;ll just hurt worse!\u201d    <\/p>\n<p>8) Burst into tears when money is mentioned.    <\/p>\n<p>7) Ask if the deal is good for all your personalities.    <\/p>\n<p>6) Tell them you&#8217;ll accept their offer if they can guess your color of underwear.    <\/p>\n<p>5) Repeat everything they say in the form of a question.<br \/>\n4) As soon as they identify themselves, say, \u201cYou guys are still in business? Well, I guess the bomb has another 30 seconds.\u201d   <\/p>\n<p>3) Tell them the restraining order applies to phone calls as well as physical distance.    <\/p>\n<p>2) Mutter:  \u201cAww, damn.  Not another one.  The last Jehovah&#8217;s Witness almost got me the death penalty.\u201d    <\/p>\n<p>1) HANG UP THE DARN PHONE!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1293\/office-jokes\/top-10-ways-to-get-rid-of-telemarketers\/\"><img decoding=\"async\" width=\"150\" src=\"\" class=\"alignleft wp-post-image tfe\" alt=\"\" title=\"\" \/><\/a><p>10) Pretend you don&#8217;t speak English. 9) Say \u201cHold on,\u201d then scream to a person: \u201cIf you try to take the knife out, it&#8217;ll just hurt worse!\u201d 8) Burst into tears when money is mentioned. 7) Ask if the deal &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/jokeslab.com\/jokes\/1293\/office-jokes\/top-10-ways-to-get-rid-of-telemarketers\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[18],"tags":[549],"class_list":["post-1293","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-office-jokes","tag-telephone"],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.8 - 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