Blonde Jokes        RSS 2.0

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• Blonde Cop

  23 June 2008, by Editor

  A blonde cop pulls over another blonde and says, "I don’t know why I pulled you over, but can I see some ID?"

  The blonde replies, "What is an ID?"

  The cop says, "It’s a small square with your picture on it."

  The driver pulls out a mirror and says, "Here you go!" The cop then says, "Why didn’t you tell me you were a cop? Then I never would of pulled you over!"

• Lucky Blonde

  23 June 2008, by Editor

  There were three women, a Brunette, a Red Head, and a Blonde. They all worked together at an office.

  Every day they noticed that their boss left work a little early. So one day they met together and decided that today when the boss left, they would all leave early too.

  The boss left and so did they. The Brunette went home and straight to bed so could get an early start the next morning. The Red Head went home to get in a quick work out before her dinner date. The Blonde went home and walked into the bedroom. She opens the door slowly and saw her husband in bed with her boss, so she shut the door and left.

  The next day, the Brunette and the Red Head are talking about going home early again. They ask the Blonde if she wants to leave early again. "No," she says, "yesterday I nearly got caught!"

• Speeding

  23 June 2008, by Editor

  One day, a blonde and a brunette were driving to a party and they were speeding because they were late.

  "Watch out for cops," the brunette said.

  They drove on for about five minutes when suddenly the blonde said nervously, "I think that’s a cop behind us."

  "Is it after us?" the brunette questioned.

  "Er, um..." answered the blonde.

  "Well, is it?" asked the brunette with a growing temper.

  "I don’t know..."

  "Well are it’s lights on?" insisted the brunette.

  Replied the blonde, "Yes... no... yes... no... yes... no... yes... no..."

• Blonde Interview

  23 June 2008, by Editor

  A blonde goes for a job interview in an office. The interviewer decides to start with the basics.

  "So, miss, can you tell us your age, please?" The blonde counts carefully on her fingers for about 30 seconds before replying "Ehhhh ..22!".

  The interviewer tries another straightforward one to break the ice. "And can you tell us your height, please?". The young lady stands up and produces a measuring tape from her handbag. She then traps one end under her foot and extends the tape to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces "Five feet two!".

  This isn’t looking good, so the interviewer goes for the real basics. "And ehh, just to confirm for our records, your name please?"

  The blonde bobs her head from side to side for about twenty seconds, mouthing something silently to herself, before replying "Mandy!".

  The interviewer is completely baffled at this stage, so he asks "Just out of curiosity, miss. We can understand your counting on your fingers to work out your age, and the measuring tape for your height is obvious, but what were you doing when we asked you your name?"

  "Ohh that!", replies the blonde, "That’s just me running through ’Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you....’ "