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Tag Archives: wife
Gift for mother-in-law
Two guys were talking at work. “I’ve got a problem,” said the first one. “What is it?” “My wife has done it to me again. I’m supposed to buy my mother-in-law a present for her birthday, from the two of … Continue reading
Posted in Birthday Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged birthday, cemetery plot, gift, husband, mother-in-law, wife Leave a comment
Woman’s age
Some people grow old gracefully, while others fight and scratch the whole way. Andy’s wife, refusing to give in to the looks of growing old, goes out and buys a new line of expensive cosmetics guaranteed to make her look … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Your Momma Jokes Tagged age, cosmetics, hair, husband, mirror, skin, wife, woman Leave a comment
Sandy was drinking at a pub
Sandy was drinking at a pub all night. When he got up to leave, he fell flat on his face. He tried to stand again, but to no avail, falling flat on his face. He decided to crawl outside and … Continue reading
Posted in Bar Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes Tagged bar, bed, drink, sleep, wheelchair, wife Leave a comment
A loyal wife
There was a man who had worked all of his life, had saved all of his money, and was a real miser when it came to his money. Just before he died, he said to his wife, “When I die, … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged casket, check, husband, money, wife Leave a comment
0 to 200 in 6 seconds
Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged car, gift, scale, wedding, wife Leave a comment
Your horse called up
A man was sitting reading his paper when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. “What was that for?” the man asked. The wife replied “That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged horse, husband, pants, telephone, wife Leave a comment
Wife knows everything
For sale by owner: Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica. No longer need them — damn wife knows everything!!
Relationship guide
For all you guys out there who just can’t figure it out, here it is: In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes and you get points. Do something she dislikes … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged family, guide, husband, man, relationship, wife, woman Leave a comment
Mother in law
A man’s house is on fire. He runs out of the house with his son and tells him to wait outside. Then he runs back in and gets is daughter and brings her outside. Then his wife. Then the dog. … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Your Momma Jokes Tagged dog, fire, man, mother-in-law, son, wife Leave a comment
A cheap dinner
A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. The barman charges him 15 cents. Confused, but not complaining, the man pays. After a while he decides to have another, and some food, so he orders another beer and … Continue reading
Posted in Bar Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Restaurant Jokes Tagged bar, beer, boss, food, sex, wife Leave a comment
Hearing problem
A concerned husband went to a doctor to talk about his wife. He says to the doctor, ”Doctor, I think my wife is deaf because she never hears me the first time and always asks me to repeat things.” ”Well,” … Continue reading
Top ten signs your spouse is having a cyber affair
10. Lately, she sits at the computer naked. 9. After signing off, he always has a cigarette. 8. The giant rubber inflatable disk drive. 7. In the morning, the computer screen is all fogged up. 6. He’s gotten amazingly good … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List Tagged computer, date, husband, internet, sex, top 10 list, wife Leave a comment
Arbor Day
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, “I bet you don’t know what day this is.” “Of course I do,” he indignantly answered, going out the door to the office. At 10 AM, the doorbell rang, and … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Holiday Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged gift, husband, sex, wife Leave a comment
Kiss your cheek
A married couple was in a terrible accident where the woman’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from her body because she was too skinny. So the husband offered to donate … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Hospital Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged buttocks, cheek, husband, mother-in-law, surgery, wife Leave a comment
Tee Shot
A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed. He was driving his partner nuts. Finally his exasperated partner says, “What’s taking so long? … Continue reading
Magic beer
So this guy walks into a bar and says, “Gve me two beers.” The bartender obliges him. The guy looks into his wallet and says, “Give me two more beers.” So the bartender gives him two more beers. The man … Continue reading
The perfect wife
What is the perfect wife? A good-looking, sex-craved, chef who owns a liquor store.
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A Tagged husband, liquor, sex, wife Leave a comment
If you stick that damn thing in me again, I’m going to break it in half!
A couple went to church every week, but every week without fail the husband would fall asleep during the sermon. The wife, being embarrassed by her husband’s loud snoring, decided to bring a needle to the next service and poke … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes Tagged church, God, husband, sex, sleep, wife Leave a comment
3 eggs and 10,000 dollars
One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years about it. “Oh, that,” … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged bed, cheat, egg, husband, money, wife Leave a comment
Great trade!
”I just got a new set of golf clubs for my wife!” ”Great trade!”