Tag Archives: marriage

A dog named Sex

a-dog-named-sex

Everybody I know who has a dog usually calls him “Rover” or “Spot”. I call mine Sex. Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to the City Hall to renew the dog’s license, I told the … Continue reading

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Was Jesus Jewish,Irish, Purerto Rican, Italian, Californian, or Black?

why-you-should-not-study

PROOF THAT JESUS WAS Jewish: 1. He went into his father’s business. 2. He lived at home until the age of 33. 3. He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure he was God. PROOF … Continue reading

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What is it?

funny-wedding-cake-you-cannot-run-away

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was, and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with. If it just sits in your room, messes up your stuff, … Continue reading

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The wishing well

photo-bomb-naked-man

A couple comes up to a wishing well. The guy leans over, makes a wish, and throws in a penny. His wife decides to make a wish, too, but she leans over too far, falls into the well, and drowns. … Continue reading

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Grounds for divorce

funny-girl-reject-christ-receive-bacon

A judge was interviewing a woman regarding her pending divorce, “What are the grounds for your divorce?” She replied, “About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property.” “I mean,” he continued, “What are your … Continue reading

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Pretend we’re married

dude-you-will-get-three-mother-in-laws

A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment, they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man on … Continue reading

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Rejected

terrosists-in-beach

These three married couples died and when they got to the pearly gates. St.Peter told the first husband, “I can’t let you in. You let alcohol run your life. You even married a girl named Sherry.” Dejected, he turned and … Continue reading

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Why women wear white on their wedding day?

high-heel-yoga-girl-reading

Why do women wear white on their wedding day? All major kitchen appliances come in white.

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After all, I was married to her for 40 years

photobomb-hairy-belly

Two fellas are fishing in a boat under a bridge. One looks up and sees a funeral procession starting across the bridge. He stands up, takes off his cap, and bows his head. The procession crosses the bridge and the … Continue reading

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Difference between men and women

funny-man-with-two-girls

1. A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he wants. A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn’t want. 2. A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband. A man never … Continue reading

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Why do wives live longer ?

funny-feminist-shoes-naked-man-as-heel

Why do wives live longer than their husbands? Because they aren’t married to women!

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The wrong marriage

hilarious-weird-and-sexy-t-shirts-design-rate-my-breast

At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, “aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?” The other replied, “Yes I am, I married the wrong man.”

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Buying condoms

A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, “What are these, Dad?” The man matter-of-factly replies, “Those are called condoms, son. Men use them … Continue reading

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Men vs. Women

funny-man-and-woman-before-marriage

NICKNAMES If Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose go out for lunch, they will call each other Laura, Suzanne, Debra and Rose. If Mike, Charlie, Bob and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, … Continue reading

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Last name

funny-wedding-photo-seduce-the-bride

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, “How many children do you have?” “Ten,” she replied. “What are their names?” he asked. “David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David … Continue reading

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What is it?

funny-wedding-animal-legs

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it was and always will be yours. If it never returns, it was never yours to begin with. If, however, it just sits in your living room, messes up … Continue reading

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Before it starts

funny-shopping-bag-sexy-thigh

A man comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells his wife, “Get me a beer before it starts!” The wife sighs and gets him a beer. Ten … Continue reading

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Black magic man

happy-time-for-girls-and-funny-guy

An old man and woman were married for years even though they hated each other. When they had a fight, screams and yelling could be heard deep into the night. A constant statement was heard by the neighbors who feared … Continue reading

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4-letter words

funny-chair-high-heel

A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother. “Well, how was the honeymoon?” asked the mother. “Oh mamma!” she exclaimed. “The honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic!” No sooner … Continue reading

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Relative by marriage

funny-sign-keep-this-area-clean

A husband and wife drove for miles in silence after a terrible argument in which neither would budge. The husband pointed to a mule in a pasture. “Relative of yours?” he asked. “Yes,” she replied. “By marriage.”

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