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Tag Archives: husband
Honeymoon spaghetti
Gary and Mary go on their honeymoon, and Gary spends six hours of the honeymoon night eating Mary’s pussy. The next afternoon, they go to an Italian restaurant. Suddenly, Gary starts to freak out. He screams, “Waiter! Waiter! Come over … Continue reading
Say something positive
A husband and wife are getting ready for bed. The wife is standing in front of a full-length mirror taking a hard look at herself. “You know, dear,” she says, “I look in the mirror, and I see an old … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged eyesight, husband, mirror, wife Leave a comment
the secret of success in marriage
A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, “Many years ago we made … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A, Your Momma Jokes Tagged child, husband, lesson, marriage, wife Leave a comment
Journey to the other side
Mr. Johnson, a businessman from Wisconsin, went on a business trip to Louisiana. He immediately sent an e-mail back home to his wife, Jennifer, to let her know he had arrived safely. Unfortunately, he mistyped a letter and the e-mail … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Computer Jokes, Family Jokes, Holiday Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Science Jokes Tagged businessman, email, hotel, husband, preacher, trip, wife Leave a comment
Wonderful time
A woman is in bed with her lover who also happens to be her husband’s best friend. After making love, while they’re just laying there, the phone rings. Since it is the woman’s house, she picks up the receiver. Her … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas Jokes, Family Jokes, Office Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Sports Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged fishing, friend, husband, sex, telephone, wife Leave a comment
Lucky you
“My wife is an angel.” “Lucky you. Mine’s still alive.”
Posted in American Jokes, Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A Tagged alive, angel, husband, luck, wife Leave a comment
Marriage lessons
On their 40th wedding anniversary and during the banquet celebrating it, Tom was asked to give his friends a brief account of the benefits of a marriage of such long duration. “Tell us Tom, just what is it you have … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A Tagged anniversary, husband, lesson, marriage, wedding Leave a comment
Good or bad?
A recently-married man goes into a drugstore to pick up some things. The clerk greets him…. Clerk: Hey, how did the wedding go? Man: Well, we got married. Clerk: That’s good! Man: No, that’s bad. I wasn’t wearing any clothes. … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Family Jokes, Office Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged clothes, fire, house, husband, marriage, rich, wife Leave a comment
I am married to your sister
There is a man who goes out drinking all the time and comes home very later every night. So one night his wife decides to teach him a lesson. She dresses up like Satan and decides to hide in the … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged drink, husband, marriage, Satan, sister, wife Leave a comment
Golden urinal
A man comes home late one night, drunk. “Where have you been?” asks his wife. “In the Golden Bar! They have golden chairs, golden glasses, golden beer, and a golden urinal!” This sounds awfully suspicious to the wife, who calls … Continue reading
Posted in Bar Jokes, Family Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged bar, drink, golden, husband, saxophone, urinal, wife Leave a comment
Heavenly Reward
Three guys died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter met them there. St. Peter said, “I know that you guys are forgiven because you’re here. But before I let you into heaven, I have to ask … Continue reading
Posted in Car Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged car, cheat, husband, Jaguar, marriage, Mercedes, Pinto, St. Peter, wife Leave a comment
FBI interview
Three men are at the FBI Building for a job interview. The interviewing FBI agent tells the first man, ”To be in the FBI you must be loyal, dedicated, and give us your all. Your wife is in the next … Continue reading
Posted in Office Jokes, People Jokes, Police Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged agent, employment, FBI, gun, husband, interview, kill, wife Leave a comment
Mushrooms and marriage
A woman announces to her friend that she is getting married for the fourth time. “How wonderful! But I hope you don’t mind me asking what happened to your first husband?” “He ate poisonous mushrooms and died.” “Oh, how tragic! … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged husband, marriage, mushroom, poison, wife Leave a comment
Never argue with a woman who reads
A couple goes on vacation to a fishing resort in northern Minnesota. The husband likes to fish at the crack of dawn. The wife likes to read. One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to … Continue reading
Posted in Office Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged boat, fishing, husband, lake, rape, read, wife, woman Leave a comment
Get your oil changed
There was a 80 year-old man that married a 21 year-old woman. A year later the woman had a baby and the doctor came out and told the old man that he was the father of a 9lb 8oz baby … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Family Jokes, Hospital Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged baby, doctor, hospital, husband, marriage, old, sex Leave a comment
I was hiding innocently in the fridge
Three guys were at the Pearly Gates when Peter answered. He said there was one space open for someone. He asked them how they died. “I came home one day and saw my wife in bed, naked. I looked all … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged husband, kill, nake, paint, refrigerator, sex, St. Peter, wife Leave a comment
Blonde’s puzzle
One day, a blonde named Sally was putting together a puzzle. She was really stumped and very frustrated, so she decided to ask her husband for help. ”It’s supposed to be a tiger!” Sally cried. ”Honey,” said Dan, “Put the … Continue reading
Wrong number?
The housewife answered the phone and listened with relief to the voice in her ear. “How are you, dear? What kind of day are you having?” “Oh, mom, the baby won’t eat, the washing machine is broke, I’ve not been … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes Tagged house, housewife, husband, mother, telephone Leave a comment
Vice President
Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end. Finally she couldn’t take it any longer, and told him, “Listen, it … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Office Jokes, People Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged grocery, husband, pea, president, promotion, wife Leave a comment
Bed football
An old man was in bed with his wife when suddenly he let out a loud fart. He yelled, “7 points!” His wife looked at him and said, “What the hell are you doing?” He simply replied, “Just playing bed … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes, Sports Jokes Tagged bed, fart, football, husband, pants, wife Leave a comment