Tag Archives: girl

Season pass

free-blow-job-if-you-buy-coke-here

On the first day of college, the Dean addressed the students, pointing out some of the rules: “The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule … Continue reading

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Top 10 reasons why cats are small women in fur coat

Top 10 reasons why cats are small women in fur coat

1. Cats do what they want, when they want. 2. They rarely listen to you. 3. They’re totally unpredictable. 4. They whine when they are not happy. 5. When you want to play they want to be left alone. 6. … Continue reading

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Stand in line for that too

funny-dogs-queue-for-peeing-on-a-tree

During a busy Pre-Christmas day at Sydney airport, a crowded flight was cancelled. A single agent was re-booking a long line of inconvenienced travelers. Suddenly, an angry passenger pushed his way to the desk. He slapped his ticket down on … Continue reading

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Glad Ass, Happy Butt

combing-hais-mother-and-daughters

It was this little girl’s first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, “Happy Butt.” The teacher said, “Honey I don’t think that’s your name you need to go to the principal’s … Continue reading

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Sex or secs

young-girls-in-disneyland

An 8-year-old girl went to her dad, who was working in the yard. She asked him, “Daddy, what is Sex?” The father was surprised that she would ask such a question, but decided that if she is old enough to … Continue reading

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You can try again

funny-old-gentleman-and-boobs

A young unmarried girl discovers that she is pregnant. Scared, she confides this ’news’ to her mother. Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, “Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!”The girl picks up the … Continue reading

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Screw or twist

bikini-girl-on-beach

It’s the spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date, Peggy Sue. Bobby’s a pretty hip guy with his own car and a ducktail hairdo. When he goes to the front door, Peggy Sue’s father answers and … Continue reading

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Naked pole vaulting

camera-woman-in-summer

A group of guys were chatting with a good-looking girl and, somewhat improbably, asked her to climb this pole that was conveniently nearby. For whatever reason, she decided to do it. When she told her mother what happened, her mother … Continue reading

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Mathematics

shit-slogan-my-boyfriends-wife-hate-these-boobs

He’s teaching her arithmetic, he said it was his mission. He kissed her once, he kissed her twice and said, ”Now that’s addition.” And as he added smack by smack, in silent sanctification, she sweetly gave the kisses back and … Continue reading

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He said, she said

boys-like-balls

Girl and boy are having a relationship of about four months now. One Friday night they meet at a bar after work. They stay for a few, then go on to get some food at a local restaurant near their … Continue reading

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Homework

look-like-girl-and-dog

A little girl came home from school and said to her mother, “Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn’t do.” The mother exclaimed, “But that’s terrible! I’m going to have a talk with your teacher … Continue reading

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You got an ’F’ in sex

funny-kids-strip-dance-and-babies

A little girl and her mother were out and about. Out of the blue, the girl asked her mother, “Mommy, How old are you?” The mother responded, “Honey, women don’t talk about their age. You’ll learn this as you get … Continue reading

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Girls can get as many as they want

funny-toilet-mural

An 8 year old boy walks home from school each day passing an 8 year old girl’s house. One day as he is passing by, carrying a football, he can’t resist taunting the girl. He holds up his football and … Continue reading

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Drawing God

child-cheater-angry-child

A Kindergarten teacher was walking around the classroom observing the students while they were drawing. Stopping at the desk of one little girl who was working hard on her drawing, the teacher asked what the girl was drawing. The girl … Continue reading

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Black eyes

camera-woman-checking-skirts

A guy with two black eyes walks into church one Sunday. The priest notices him and is very concerned. “What happened, my child?” “I was singing in the choir, Father, and I noticed that the girl in front of me … Continue reading

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Parachute

funny-old-gentleman-and-boobs

Four people are in an airplane: the president, the smartest man in the world, an old man and a young girl. The plane catches on fire and there are only three parachutes. The president gets one and says, “My country … Continue reading

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If men ruled the world

so-many-cctvs

Any fake phone number a girl gave you would automatically forward your call to her real number. Nodding and looking at your watch would be deemed an acceptable response to “I love you.” Hallmark would make “Sorry, what was your … Continue reading

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It’s an hour fast!

funny-comoputer

A man is sitting at a bar one night, wearing a fancy new watch, covered with buttons and lights and dials. The woman next to him says, “Wow, that’s a really fancy watch.” “Thanks, says the guy, “It’s the cutting … Continue reading

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Stop lipstick on the mirror

breakfast-in-bed

According to a news report, a certain private school in Victoria, BC recently was faced with a unique problem. A number of grade 12 girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was … Continue reading

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One good deed

funny-erection

A guy just died and he’s at the pearly gates, waiting to be admitted, while St. Peter is leafin’ through this Big Book to see if the guy is worthy. St. Peter goes through the Book several times and furrows … Continue reading

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