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Tag Archives: child
Life pattern
Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God’s omnipotence did not extend to God’s kids. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve. And the first thing He said … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Your Momma Jokes Tagged Adam, apple, child, Eve, God Leave a comment
Bad education
Its Christmas at a normal family’s home…. 4 year old sister, mom, dad, 16 year old sister and 14 year old brother. Mom in the kitchen stuffing the turkey. All of a sudden turkey falls off counter and mom goes … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Christmas Jokes, Kids Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged child, Christmas, dirty, education Leave a comment
Period
The kindergarten class had a homework assignment to find out about something exciting and relate it to the class the next day. When the time came for the little kids to give their reports, the teacher was calling on them … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged child, classroom, period, sex Leave a comment
A child’s pray
One night, a father passed by his son’s room and heard his son praying: “God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa.” The father didn’t quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged child, father, pray Leave a comment
Father Christmas gift
Alex was five; all his Christmas presents were always signed, ’from Father Christmas.’ A little while after Alex had opened all his presents on Christmas morning, we became aware that he was looking quite down in the mouth for no … Continue reading
Posted in Christmas Jokes, Holiday Jokes, Kids Jokes Tagged child, Christmas, father, gift, mother Leave a comment
Glad Ass, Happy Butt
It was this little girl’s first day of school and the teacher asked her what her name was and she replied, “Happy Butt.” The teacher said, “Honey I don’t think that’s your name you need to go to the principal’s … Continue reading
Mother-in-law
A small farm boy was milking his cow when all of a sudden a bull came charging towards him. As horrified workers nearby watched, the boy calmly continued his milking. To everyone’s astonishment, the bull stopped a few inches from … Continue reading
Posted in Animal Jokes, Kids Jokes, Miscellaneous Jokes Tagged bull, child, cow, mother-in-law Leave a comment
Charming
Two delicate blossoms of Southern femininity, one from Mississippi and the other from Texas, were conversing on the porch swing of a large white-pillared mansion. The Mississippian said, “When my first child was born, my husband built this beautiful mansion … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, People Jokes, Texas Jokes, Your Momma Jokes Tagged child, gift, husband, Mississippi, Texas, wife Leave a comment
Dad’s poem
Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers. The first boy says, ’My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.’ The second boy says, ’That’s … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Kids Jokes, People Jokes Tagged child, fagther, money, poem, sermon, song Leave a comment
Little Johnny
There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn’t know what Johnny’s problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. They would always comment that he was two … Continue reading
I’m four
A man escaped jail by digging a hole from his jail cell to the outside world. When finally his work was done, he emerged in the middle of a preschool playground. “I’m free, I’m free!” he shouted. “So what,” said … Continue reading
Posted in Campus Jokes, Kids Jokes, People Jokes Tagged child, escape, prison, school Leave a comment
the secret of success in marriage
A couple had been married for 45 years and had raised a brood of 11 children and were blessed with 22 grandchildren. When asked the secret for staying together all that time, the wife replies, “Many years ago we made … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Short Q & A, Your Momma Jokes Tagged child, husband, lesson, marriage, wife Leave a comment
What did Eve say to Adam when she didn’t want any more children?
A man and his wife were sitting in church, the man was sleeping and his wife was knitting. The priest asked “Who created the Earth and man?” The woman poked the man with her knitting needle and the man screamed, … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Country Jokes, Family Jokes, Office Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Texas Jokes Tagged Adam, child, church, Eve, God, sleep Leave a comment
Mathematics
He’s teaching her arithmetic, he said it was his mission. He kissed her once, he kissed her twice and said, ”Now that’s addition.” And as he added smack by smack, in silent sanctification, she sweetly gave the kisses back and … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Campus Jokes, Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, Science Jokes Tagged boy, child, division, girl, kiss, math Leave a comment
Things I’ve learned from my children
1. Garbage bags do not make good parachutes. 2. A 3-year-old is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant. 3. If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite. 4. … Continue reading
Posted in Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, Top 10 List Tagged bag, ceiling fan, child, dog, pool, restaurant, TV, window Leave a comment
God is missing
Two 6 year old boys were attending religious school and giving the teachers problems. The teachers had tried everything to make them behave – time outs, notes home, missed recesses – but could do nothing with them. Finally the boys … Continue reading
Posted in Church and God Jokes, Computer Jokes, Kids Jokes Tagged child, God, priest, school Leave a comment
Family history
One day a sweet little girl becomes puzzled about her origin. “How did I get here, Mommy?” she asks. Her mother replies, using a well-worn phrase, “Why God sent you, Honey.” “And did God send you too, Mommy?” she continues. … Continue reading
Posted in American Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Family Jokes, Kids Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes Tagged child, daughter, family, God, mother, sex Leave a comment
No punishment
Boy: Will you punish me for something i didn’t do? Teacher: Of course not! Boy: Good cause I didn’t do my homework!
Posted in Campus Jokes, Kids Jokes Tagged child, classroom, homework, punish, school Leave a comment
Little Johnny’s essay
Little Johnny’s teacher said, “Johnny, your essay on My Dog is exactly the same as your sister’s.” Did you copy hers?, she asked. Johnny replied, “No, teacher, it’s the same dog!”
Posted in Animal Jokes, Campus Jokes, Kids Jokes Tagged campus, child, dog, essay, homework Leave a comment
Chemical formula for water
Little Johnny’s teacher asks, “What is the chemical formula for water?” Little Johnny replies, “HIJKLMNO”!! The teacher, puzzled, asks, “What on Earth are you talking about?” Little Johnny replies, “Yesterday you said it was H to O!”
Posted in Campus Jokes, Kids Jokes, Science Jokes Tagged campus, chemistry, child, school, science, water Leave a comment