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Tag Archives: bed
Sandy was drinking at a pub all night. When he got up to leave, he fell flat on his face. He tried to stand again, but to no avail, falling flat on his face. He decided to crawl outside and … Continue reading
One day, while Sue was cleaning under the bed, she found a small box. Curious, she opened it and found 3 eggs and 10,000 dollars. A little bit suspicious, she confronted her husband of twenty years about it. “Oh, that,” … Continue reading
Mother: Come on, Victor, you have to get out of bed or you’ll be late for school. Victor: Aw, Mom do I have to? All the teachers hate me, and all the students hate me too. Mother: Yes you do. … Continue reading
John invited his mother over for dinner. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn’t help but noticing how beautiful John’s room-mate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between John and his room-mate, and this had … Continue reading
An old man was in bed with his wife when suddenly he let out a loud fart. He yelled, “7 points!” His wife looked at him and said, “What the hell are you doing?” He simply replied, “Just playing bed … Continue reading
One night a father sent his kid to bed. Five minutes later the boy screamed, ”Dad! Can you get me a glass of water!?!” ”No. You had your chance.” A minute later the boy screamed ”Dad!! Can you get me … Continue reading
There was a lady, who had a dog that she loved, and he followed her everywhere. One morning she woke up, went to the bathroom, came out, and realized that her dog wasn’t at her feet. She found him in … Continue reading
A woman complains to her friend that her husband is losing interest in sex, and he prefers nights out with the guys to the joys of copulation. Her friend tells her that to win his love, she must make more … Continue reading
A woman’s husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to,he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he … Continue reading
Jackson went to a psychiatrist. “Doc,” he said, “I’ve got trouble. Every time I get into bed I think there’s somebody under it. I get under the bed, I think there’s somebody on top of it. Top, under, top, under. … Continue reading
As it was a beautiful day, a woman decided to stretch out on a park bench and soak up the sun. After ten minutes, a down-and-out wino came over to her and said: “Hi, gorgeous. How about you and me … Continue reading
One day a blonde finds out from her friend that her boyfriend is cheating on her. So one day she goes out to the mall and buys a gun. After that she goes to her boyfriend’s house. She busts down … Continue reading
What did the blonde mother say to the blonde daughter? “If you’re not in bed by 12, you should come home!”