Category Archives: Top 10 List

it is top 10, maybe top 20 lists for laughing

Computer gender

sexy-tech-girl

      Women claim that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because: In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on. They have a lot of data, but are still clueless. They are … Continue reading

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Differences between you and your boss

funny-sale-sign-save $-10

When you take a long time, you’re slow. When your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough. When you don’t do it, you’re lazy. When your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy. When you make a mistake, you’re an … Continue reading

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51 ways to annoy everybody

51 ways to annoy everybody

1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn’t matter which. 2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes. 3) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour, and when people ask you about it, … Continue reading

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Mr. or Mrs. Computer?

Mr. or Mrs. Computer?

Is your computer male or female? As you are aware, ships have long been characterized as being female (e.g., “Steady as she goes”, or”She’s listing to starboard, Captain!”). Recently, a group of computer scientists (all males) announced that computers should … Continue reading

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Top 10 reasons why cats are small women in fur coat

Top 10 reasons why cats are small women in fur coat

1. Cats do what they want, when they want. 2. They rarely listen to you. 3. They’re totally unpredictable. 4. They whine when they are not happy. 5. When you want to play they want to be left alone. 6. … Continue reading

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Top ten reasons to go to work naked…

Top ten reasons to go to work naked

1. Your boss is always yelling, “I wanna see your ass in here by 8:00!” 2. Can take advantage of computer monitor radiation to work on your tan. 3. “I’d love to chip in, but I left my wallet in … Continue reading

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Top ten things NOT to say to your new girlfriend’s parents…

Top ten things NOT to say to your new girlfriend

10. Can I pull my car in your garage? I’m not sure how long that cop car will stay lost. 9. There ain’t nothing that beats that great feeling of knowing your HIV test results are negative! I bet Sara’s … Continue reading

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Top ten signs your spouse is having a cyber affair

stop-staring-tits, touch them

10. Lately, she sits at the computer naked. 9. After signing off, he always has a cigarette. 8. The giant rubber inflatable disk drive. 7. In the morning, the computer screen is all fogged up. 6. He’s gotten amazingly good … Continue reading

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Top 10 things NOT to say to a father when picking up his daughter for a date

Playboy and boobs

1. “Now.. show me how you used to spank her.” 2. “Do you think she would put out if I told her that I loved her?” 3. “I just got my license today.” 4. “Five bucks says she’s a D-cup.” … Continue reading

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Top 10 blonde FAQs

funny-tree-braid, blonde girl

1. Q: How do you get a blonde to marry you? A: Tell her she’s pregnant. 2. Q: How does a blonde kill a fish? A: She drowns it. 3. Q: How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? … Continue reading

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Top 10 differences between man and woman

curious-man-studying-girls-buttocks

1. A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. 2. Men wake up as good-looking as when they went to bed. Women somehow … Continue reading

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Top ten ways to tell someone their fly is unzipped

funny-football-stars-enjoying-blow-jobs

1. The cucumber has left the salad. 2. Someone tore down the wall, and your Pink Floyd is hanging out. 3. Your soldier ain’t so unknown now. 4. Quasimodo needs to go back in the tower and tend to his … Continue reading

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Top 10 blonde science fair projects

Top 10 blonde science fair projects

10) Are poisonous snakes really venomous? 9) Is lighter fluid flammable? 8) What hurts more: falling off a building, or a cliff? 7) Are knives sharp? 6) Can sharks hurt a human? 5) What happens if I stick my hand … Continue reading

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How to annoy your co-workers

How to annoy your co-workers

1) Page yourself over the intercom.  Don’t disguise your voice. 2) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. This is especially effective if your boss is a … Continue reading

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10 things that sound dirty at Thanksgiving, but aren’t…

10 things that sound dirty at Thanksgiving, but aren’t...

10. “Just reach in and grab the giblets.” 9. “Whew…that’s one terrific spread!” 8. “I am in the mood for a little dark meat!” 7. “Tying the legs together will keep the inside moist.” 6. “Talk about a HUGE breast!” … Continue reading

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10 signs you are internet-addicted

10 signs you are internet-addicted

10) You wake up at 3 am to go to the bathroom, and check your facebook on the way back to bed. 9) Your firstborn is named Dotcom. 8) You turn off your router and are suddenly filled with a … Continue reading

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Top 10 rejection lines for male and female

Top 10 rejection lines for male and female

10. I think of you as a brother.Translation: You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in ‘Deliverance.’ 9. There’s a slight difference in our ages. Translation: I don’t want to do my dad. 8. I’m not attracted to you … Continue reading

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Top ten things to say about a Christmas gift you don’t like…

funny-photo-bomb-daughter-and-angry-mother

10. Hey! Now there’s a gift! 9. Well, well, well… 8. Boy, if I had not recently shot up 4 sizes that would’ve fit. 7. This is perfect for wearing around the basement. 6. Gosh. I hope this never catches … Continue reading

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Translating male phrases

wine-baby-feeding

“I’m going fishing.” Really means… “I’m going to drink myself dangerously stupid and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety.” “It’s a guy thing.” Really means…. “There is no … Continue reading

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When you have PMS

yes-buttocks

1) Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2) You’re adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet. 3) The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4) Your man is suddenly agreeing to everything you say. 5) You’re … Continue reading

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