Category Archives: British Jokes

Last words

sexy-camera-girl

An English guy was very ill and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and pad by the bed. With his last ounce of strength he wrote … Continue reading

Posted in British Jokes, Hospital Jokes | Tagged , , | Leave a comment

English Jesus

1Why wasn

Why wasn’t Jesus born in Essex, England? Because they couldn’t find three wise men and a virgin!

Posted in British Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Short Q & A | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Horse’s ass

ducks-crossing-road

The U.S. Standard railroad gauge (distance between the rails) is 4 feet, 8.5 inches. That’s an exceedingly odd number. Why was that gauge used? Because that’s the way they built them in England, and the U.S. railroads were built by … Continue reading

Posted in American Jokes, British Jokes, Office Jokes, Politician Jokes, Science Jokes | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Keep the egg

kick-your-ass-when-you-take-photo

There was once a Scotsman and an Englishman who lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen’s eggs for breakfast. One day … Continue reading

Posted in British Jokes, Country Jokes, Family Jokes, People Jokes | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Suicide

shooting-girl

Three men, an Scot, an English man and a sumo wrestler were going to commit suicide by jumping of the top of a building. The Scot jumped off and shouted ”God save Scotland!” The English man jumped off and shouted … Continue reading

Posted in British Jokes, Country Jokes, Japanese jokes, People Jokes | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Was Jesus Jewish,Irish, Purerto Rican, Italian, Californian, or Black?

why-you-should-not-study

PROOF THAT JESUS WAS Jewish: 1. He went into his father’s business. 2. He lived at home until the age of 33. 3. He was sure his mother was a virgin, and his mother was sure he was God. PROOF … Continue reading

Posted in American Jokes, British Jokes, Church and God Jokes, Country Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes | Tagged , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Romantic pink slip

crazy-guy-checking-girls-breast

Dear __________________________, I regret to inform you that you have been eliminated from further contention as Mr. Right.  As you are probably aware, the competition was exceedingly tough and dozens of well-qualified candidates such as yourself also failed to make … Continue reading

Posted in American Jokes, British Jokes, France and French Jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes, Top 10 List | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Thanksgiving in the UK

funny-pose-I-can-find-the-bird

A few years ago, an American and a British journalist were discussing Thanksgiving on a British radio program. The American asked if Thanksgiving was celebrated in the UK. “Yes,” the British journalist replied, “but we celebrate it on the 6th … Continue reading

Posted in American Jokes, British Jokes, Thanksgiving Jokes | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Drinking buddies

photo-bomb-dog-mating

Two men are sitting next to each other in an Irish-style pub in New York City. They both order pints of Guinness. One of them turns to the other and says “So where are you from, then?” “I’m from Ireland.” … Continue reading

Posted in Bar Jokes, British Jokes, Family Jokes, New York Jokes, People Jokes, Politician Jokes | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Scotsman at a baseball game

funny-ad-bad-breath-aquafresh

A Scottish tourist attended his first baseball game in the US and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring “Run….Run!” The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd … Continue reading

Posted in American Jokes, British Jokes, Sports Jokes | Tagged , , , , | Leave a comment

Men and woman

photo-bomb-naked-man

On a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere, the following people are stranded: 2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman, 2 French men and 1 French woman, 2 German men and 1 German woman, 2 Greek men and … Continue reading

Posted in American Jokes, British Jokes, Country Jokes, France and French Jokes, Hotel and Travel Jokes, Japanese jokes, Relationship, Marriage, and Sex Jokes | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Thaw the chicken

funny-wrong-job-fun-car-operator

Scientists at NASA have developed a gun built specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with … Continue reading

Posted in Animal Jokes, British Jokes, Office Jokes, Science Jokes | Tagged , , , , , | Leave a comment