Author Archives: JokesLab

The guardian angel

funny wedding photo

A man was walking in the street when he heard a voice. ” Stop! Stand still! If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.” The man stopped and a big brick … Continue reading

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0 to 200 in 6 seconds

funny-girl-smelling-her-breast

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER … Continue reading

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What a job!

state-sign-of-Vermont-pure-maple-syrup

Can you imagine working at the following Company? It has a little over 500 employees with the following statistics: 29 have been accused of spouse abuse 7 have been arrested for fraud 19 have been accused of writing bad cheques … Continue reading

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Your horse called up

funny-and-sexy-ad-mens-dream-wife

A man was sitting reading his paper when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan. “What was that for?” the man asked. The wife replied “That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny … Continue reading

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Computer dating

funny-wedding-animal-legs-bride-legs

A hopeful suitor dropped into a computer-dating center and registered his qualifications. He wanted someone who enjoyed water sports, liked company, favored formal attire, and was very small. The computer operated faultlessly. It sent him a penguin.  

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You’re the next

it

A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a … Continue reading

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Differences between you and your boss

funny-sale-sign-save $-10

When you take a long time, you’re slow. When your boss takes a long time, he’s thorough. When you don’t do it, you’re lazy. When your boss doesn’t do it, he’s too busy. When you make a mistake, you’re an … Continue reading

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Life at work is great

photobomb-i-enjoy-masterbating and sexy girls

A young technician and his boss board a train headed through the mountains. They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother. After a while, it is … Continue reading

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State slogans

funny-bush-picking-up-phone

Alabama: At Least We’re not Mississippi Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can’t be Wrong! Arizona: But It’s a Dry Heat Arkansas: Litterasy Ain’t Everthing California: As Seen on TV Colorado: If You Don’t Ski, Don’t Bother Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only Dirtier and … Continue reading

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Something to play with

natural-cock-cactus

When I was growing up I was so poor if I wasn’t a boy I would have had nothing to play with.

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Last words

sexy-camera-girl

An English guy was very ill and his son went to visit him in the hospital. Suddenly, the father began to breathe heavily and grabbed the pen and pad by the bed. With his last ounce of strength he wrote … Continue reading

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Yell Together

Yell Together

Two blondes realize that their apartment is on fire and go out onto the balcony. “Help, help!” yells one of the blondes. “Help us, help us!” yells the other. “Maybe it would help if we yelled together,” said the first … Continue reading

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When I’m on the telephone

When I

Man: Doc, you’ve gotta help me. I’m hearing voices but I don’t see people. Doc: And when are you hearing these voices? Man: When I’m on the telephone.

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Blondes Are Not Stupid Convention

woman enjoying mens-underwear

80,000 blondes are gathered for a Blondes Are Not Stupid convention. The leader says, “We are all here today to prove to the world that blondes are not stupid. Can I have a volunteer?” A blonde gingerly works her way … Continue reading

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Blonde with chickens

Blonde with chickens

A blonde is walking down the street and a car pulled up next to her. The man in the car says to her, ”What do you have in the bag?” The blonde replies: ”I have chickens!” The man thinks for … Continue reading

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51 ways to annoy everybody

51 ways to annoy everybody

1) Pretend to be one of the Bush family. Doesn’t matter which. 2) Have an uncontrollable lusting for someone else every five minutes. 3) Pretend to be from different ethnic backgrounds every hour, and when people ask you about it, … Continue reading

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A bet

a bet

Bob is a regular guy and he is out at a local bar one night having a good time. Jack, the bartender and owner of the bar, offered him another drink and as he did Bob spoke up. ‘Hey Jack, … Continue reading

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No-so-dumb blonde

No-so-dumb blonde

One day a blonde was sitting on a plane next to one of those smart businessmen. He asks her if she would like to play a game. She politely declines, but the man explains the game to her anyway. He … Continue reading

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Brunette meets Genie

Brunette meets Genie

A Brunette is walking through the country, when she finds a bottle. She rubs it and, you guessed it, a genie appears. The genie says,”You are allowed three wishes. But, I must warn you, anything you get, all the blondes … Continue reading

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Knock-knock jokes for blonde

Why can

Why can’t you tell blondes knock-knock jokes? Because they leave to answer the door.

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